Sitting in my room alone. That’s how i felt. I still feel this way. I’ve felt this way ever since i was little. I guess all the words the kids would say, would reoccur in my head. “Ugly”, “Stupid”, “Nasty.” But as i got older into middle and high school it got worse. “Hoe”, “Slut” ,“Thot”, “Bitch.” There were nights where i would cry all night and nobody would hear. When i said nobody would hear, lowkey meant that nobody really cared to check on me in my room. A house filled with 5 people and not one came.
I would go to school with not an ounce of sleep because i couldn't stop crying. My mom as she would like to be called would call me names as well. Not only did i have to deal with the kids at school but also with her at home. Its sad though, …show more content…
I wonder how i could love a person so much with all my heart but don't have an ounce left to love me. You learn when you grow up to love yourself just the way you are but i didn't grow up like that. I grew up having people point out my every flaw and it got to the point where i didn't need their help to find a flaw i was doing it on my own. Looking in the mirror every morning trying to see what was cute or even alright looking but i still find a way to point the worse thing. You’d think the person that was suppose to help you in life would instead of saying hurtful shit like everyone else.But crying my eyes out wasn't helping anymore as i got into 9th grade. It was a normal day in 9th grade. It was towards the beginning of the year. People would talk about me, but you know i just smiled. I couldn't do anything but smile and act like it …show more content…
By this time i had transferred schools and was clinically diagnosed as depressed by my doctor. I had to take 2 kinds of medication for it. Once i started my new school i met a group of 4 girls who were very close. The took their time to get to know me. After a while of knowing each other one of the girls realised what i was doing. She yelled at me telling me i shouldn't be doing this type of stuff and that i should have never harmed my soft beautiful skin. Then from that moment once i got home i threw away my razors and instead of marking my body i would mark the pages in my
I would go to school with not an ounce of sleep because i couldn't stop crying. My mom as she would like to be called would call me names as well. Not only did i have to deal with the kids at school but also with her at home. Its sad though, …show more content…
I wonder how i could love a person so much with all my heart but don't have an ounce left to love me. You learn when you grow up to love yourself just the way you are but i didn't grow up like that. I grew up having people point out my every flaw and it got to the point where i didn't need their help to find a flaw i was doing it on my own. Looking in the mirror every morning trying to see what was cute or even alright looking but i still find a way to point the worse thing. You’d think the person that was suppose to help you in life would instead of saying hurtful shit like everyone else.But crying my eyes out wasn't helping anymore as i got into 9th grade. It was a normal day in 9th grade. It was towards the beginning of the year. People would talk about me, but you know i just smiled. I couldn't do anything but smile and act like it …show more content…
By this time i had transferred schools and was clinically diagnosed as depressed by my doctor. I had to take 2 kinds of medication for it. Once i started my new school i met a group of 4 girls who were very close. The took their time to get to know me. After a while of knowing each other one of the girls realised what i was doing. She yelled at me telling me i shouldn't be doing this type of stuff and that i should have never harmed my soft beautiful skin. Then from that moment once i got home i threw away my razors and instead of marking my body i would mark the pages in my