Satire Essay On Being A Vegetarian

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When I was about 5 years old, I decided to become a vegetarian. I said goodbye to the life of chicken and eggs to welcome a life of vegetables and tofu.

As a child, I never ate any kind of meat other than chicken and eggs. My love for butter chicken, tandoori chicken, chicken nuggets and omelettes was very real.

Anyways, becoming a vegetarian was a decision that I made myself. No one forced me, pushed me, or even asked me. In fact, my entire family was shocked when I declared my new lifestyle. They all thought I was bluffing. Nonetheless, here we are, 14 years later and still going strong.

I remember watching a video one afternoon with my parents on how chickens were slaughtered and it horrified me. I was so young at the time and for some odd
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I spend half my time at dinners or lunches explaining my lifestyle choices, since people find the concept of being meat-free beyond fascinating.
"Does that mean, you don 't eat meat?" Well no duh sherlock. The whole premise of being a vegetarian is that you don 't consume meat. Literally this question drives me insane.
"So you 're vegan?" Alright, being vegan and being a vegetarian are two different things. If you don 't know the difference, then please go educate yourself. Personally, I could never be a vegan, my diet basically consists of mostly cheese and milk.
When people suddenly become nutritionists and get concerned about your protein intake. There are other forms of protein other than meat people. Soya products are so good and relieve any meat-cravings, plus you have tofu, lentils, beans, quinoa, etc.
When you have an inner panic attack when your veggie - whatever is being touched by meat utensils. Whether it be a BBQ or even at Subway, I cringe when meat and veggie products are handled with the same gloves or utensils. I feel a pang of guilt when I bring it up to whoever is doing the handling as I know its an extra hassle to deal

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