Sexuality In Jandy Nelson's I Ll Give You The Sun

Unlike its prominence in Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda, revealing one’s sexuality is only an underlying theme in Jandy Nelson’s I’ll Give You the Sun. The novel introduces readers to two different narrators, twins Noah and Jude, whose accounts take place at two different points in time. Specifically, the topic of homosexuality and coming out is mainly featured in Noah’s account at thirteen years old. Throughout his side of the story, Noah, who is gay, struggles to embrace his sexuality until he becomes romantically involved with his friend Brian. Specifically, the first time Noah’s sexuality is revealed to another character is when he gets an erection at the beginning of the novel. While defending himself against older hooligans named …show more content…
Throughout much of the novel, Noah slowly falls in love with his friend and seasonal neighbor, but can never be sure that his feelings are reciprocated. Noah’s dreams are dashed when Brian seemingly makes a move on Jude—but it is all just a misunderstanding. When Brian returns during winter break later that year, Noah’s dreams come true when Brian suddenly kisses him. Almost immediately, Noah outs himself to Brian by returning the sign of affection, as seen when Noah describes the following: “I run my hands through his hair, finally, finally, then bring his head to mine and kiss him so hard out teeth collide, planets collide, kissing him now for each and every time we didn’t all summer long” (Nelson 272). A short while later, the two are alone in Noah’s bedroom, pleasuring themselves with the hopes of sharing a special moment. However, the mood is quickly ruined when Noah states, “My mother as in my mother bursts in…‘Oh,’ she says. ‘Oh. Oh’” (Nelson 277). As a result of walking in during this private moment, Noah is unintentionally outed to his mother as …show more content…
After being reunited with Brian following a betrayal in which Noah outed him to others, Noah finally reveals his sexuality to both Jude and their father. Although this particular scene is written from Jude’s point of view, she describes the event as follows: “The sunset has turned the sky into a carnival of color as Noah and Brian walk out of the forest, hand in hand” (Nelson 371). Walking towards Jude and his father blatantly showcasing a sign of affection between him and Brian, Noah outs himself without saying a word. For much of the novel, the one person Noah feared coming out to the most was his father. This is due to the fact that Noah already felt that he was a failure in his father’s eyes, and was afraid of making matters even worse. However, in response to discovering his son’s sexuality, Noah and Jude’s father states, “Oh, I see. Okay, I didn’t realize. I thought, Heather, you know? But this makes more sense” (Nelson 371). Shortly thereafter, the novel ends, and it seems that Noah’s coming out was received well by the two whose opinions mattered most to him—Jude and their