The Things I Carried, or Seasons Greetings Last winter the snow fell a little harder, the air was drier, and the nights were longer. I remember the night it happened. My grandma was feeling sicker than usual, and she knew her days were numbered. Driving to her house on my own, I was so afraid of what to do or what to say because she was my best friend and my biggest idol. She taught me how to braid my own hair, how to knit scarves, and even how to cook my now favorite apple chicken meal. As I stepped on her porch my stomach dropped and I could not stop crying. My grandfather answered the door, and as he did, you could tell him watching his wife slowly die was killing him as well. As I finally stepped into the house, my grandma was on the
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From that day on, I have worn this beautiful ring my grandmother gave me on my left hand, and fourth finger. I felt as if my wedding ring finger was the best one to put it on because to me, the ring resembled purity. It resembled my youth, and that you can go far beyond life's barriers.
I began carrying around this self-loathing feeling towards myself, and it was the biggest burden I have ever encountered. Going to school used to mentally break me, I felt as if I could not grow, which was not like myself, and then lead me down the road of self-hatred and eventually depression. I could never pinpoint why I was so broken until later when I decided to finally help myself. I always held myself to such high expectations that I never allowed myself to go through any error. I remember going to the doctors, and him telling me, “Think of that one person who you look up to the most. That one person who you would do anything for, think of them and imagine them telling you what you want to tell yourself,” sitting there all I could do was cry. I imagined my grandmother telling me that my poetry made birds sing, and the films I made would go down in history. I twisted the ring she gave me, and it allowed me to breathe without fear. It allowed me to be immortal to my issues, and it allowed me to be inferior to no one. Everyone has bad days, and everyone messes up, but it is not about why you failed as it is what you will do to
From that day on, I have worn this beautiful ring my grandmother gave me on my left hand, and fourth finger. I felt as if my wedding ring finger was the best one to put it on because to me, the ring resembled purity. It resembled my youth, and that you can go far beyond life's barriers.
I began carrying around this self-loathing feeling towards myself, and it was the biggest burden I have ever encountered. Going to school used to mentally break me, I felt as if I could not grow, which was not like myself, and then lead me down the road of self-hatred and eventually depression. I could never pinpoint why I was so broken until later when I decided to finally help myself. I always held myself to such high expectations that I never allowed myself to go through any error. I remember going to the doctors, and him telling me, “Think of that one person who you look up to the most. That one person who you would do anything for, think of them and imagine them telling you what you want to tell yourself,” sitting there all I could do was cry. I imagined my grandmother telling me that my poetry made birds sing, and the films I made would go down in history. I twisted the ring she gave me, and it allowed me to breathe without fear. It allowed me to be immortal to my issues, and it allowed me to be inferior to no one. Everyone has bad days, and everyone messes up, but it is not about why you failed as it is what you will do to