Relationship Between Parents With Untreated Borderline Personality Disorder And Their Children

1226 Words Aug 17th, 2016 5 Pages
Ever since I can remember, every personalized note from a teacher, whether it be on a report card or yearbook, emphasized how much better I would do if I could just focus. If I would just follow-through, my true potential would shine. As a teenager, I rolled my eyes and allowed the commentary to roll off my back.
“Half-ass”, “lazy”, “procrastinator”, were all words thrown in my direction by my mother growing up, comparing me to my biological father whom I had yet to meet, so I had zero reference. Over the years, it became obvious to me that no matter what I tried, I wouldn’t satisfy her need for me to go all the way- either professionally or personally. It wasn’t until our relationship became estranged, and I started exploring the relationship between parents with untreated Borderline Personality Disorder and their children, that things started to make sense. When I first starting reading Surviving A Borderline Parent: How to Heal Your Childhood Wounds, and Build Trust, Boundaries, and Self-Esteem, I felt such a huge wave of relief mixed with a rush of guilt. Being conditioned by my parents to avoid excuse and blame, coupled with the constant contradiction and invalidation of my lived experience, made me feel bad for seeking any answers at all. I knew from a young age that my mother couldn’t control her rage, that there was a reason I constantly felt like I was skating on melting ice, but I only became aware when I detached from her as an adult. Borderline Personality…

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