Effects on Relationships
Friendships can be quite satisfying, but are also be a source of contention. Argyle and Henderson (1984) found that friendship is reward-based and rules of engagement are needed to keep the conflicts to a minimum (p. 213). According to exchange theory, a person will not continue to be involved in a relationship if the costs outweigh the rewards. Common benefits of friendships include social interaction and having someone that provides caring, support, or assistance in varying situations (Arglye & Henderson, 1984, p. 214). Females between the ages of eighteen to twenty-five tend to spend all of their spare time together and as a result they experience friendships that are intense and involved and they oftentimes perceive …show more content…
13). They provide an example of how one girl wants to exhibit the niceness that is expected of her and is rampant throughout her social interactions, but she indicates that it is difficult when she is not “feeling it” and it is hard to make herself happy so that she can project kindness (Brown & Gilligan, 1993, p. 17). This same female also comments about how she focuses on her surroundings and pays attention to how people perceive her as well as how to read others, specifically looking for indications of genuineness in her relationships (Brown & Gilligan, 1993, p. 18). As the study progresses, another female becomes increasingly concerned with how she is perceived and focuses on maintaining a high grade point average, always being kind, and never being seen as selfish. She uses observation to make sure that she is doing and saying the correct things so she does not to stand out and continues to fit into the prescribed image of “perfect,” thus losing herself in the process (Brown & Gilligan, 1993, pp. 23-24). The task of maintaining a particular social status is difficult, because one has to balance what they want versus what type of image will be projected. One respondent provided an example of this when she indicated that she …show more content…
This power is used as a manipulation tool in relationships (Merten, 1997, p. 180). This meanness can also revert into the internal group, especially if the power of the group as a whole is threatened or diminished (Merten, 1997, p. 182). If someone of higher status were to be challenged, then the person of higher status could call upon other friends to direct their meanness to the challenger (Merten, 1997, p. 186). Sometimes groups will use a technique referred to as revealing and concealing in which they make it known that aggressive behaviors are happening and to whom, but they refuse to give a reason (Merten, 1997, p. 187). Allowing a victim to know why she is being aggressed against opens the aggressors up to being challenged and a rebuttal given. By keeping the reason for the aggressions from her, the aggressors are flaunting the divide that has been created between those in the know and the victim (Merten, 1997, p. 187). Another tactic that is sometimes used along with the revealing and concealing method, would be to focus on a social misstep and make it into a bigger deal than it would be if the balance had not been interrupted (Merten, 1997, p. 181). An example provided by Merten (1997), discusses a female that has physically changed and was considered to be more attractive and her social stock started to rise. This change in dynamic caused offense to her friends and
Friendships can be quite satisfying, but are also be a source of contention. Argyle and Henderson (1984) found that friendship is reward-based and rules of engagement are needed to keep the conflicts to a minimum (p. 213). According to exchange theory, a person will not continue to be involved in a relationship if the costs outweigh the rewards. Common benefits of friendships include social interaction and having someone that provides caring, support, or assistance in varying situations (Arglye & Henderson, 1984, p. 214). Females between the ages of eighteen to twenty-five tend to spend all of their spare time together and as a result they experience friendships that are intense and involved and they oftentimes perceive …show more content…
13). They provide an example of how one girl wants to exhibit the niceness that is expected of her and is rampant throughout her social interactions, but she indicates that it is difficult when she is not “feeling it” and it is hard to make herself happy so that she can project kindness (Brown & Gilligan, 1993, p. 17). This same female also comments about how she focuses on her surroundings and pays attention to how people perceive her as well as how to read others, specifically looking for indications of genuineness in her relationships (Brown & Gilligan, 1993, p. 18). As the study progresses, another female becomes increasingly concerned with how she is perceived and focuses on maintaining a high grade point average, always being kind, and never being seen as selfish. She uses observation to make sure that she is doing and saying the correct things so she does not to stand out and continues to fit into the prescribed image of “perfect,” thus losing herself in the process (Brown & Gilligan, 1993, pp. 23-24). The task of maintaining a particular social status is difficult, because one has to balance what they want versus what type of image will be projected. One respondent provided an example of this when she indicated that she …show more content…
This power is used as a manipulation tool in relationships (Merten, 1997, p. 180). This meanness can also revert into the internal group, especially if the power of the group as a whole is threatened or diminished (Merten, 1997, p. 182). If someone of higher status were to be challenged, then the person of higher status could call upon other friends to direct their meanness to the challenger (Merten, 1997, p. 186). Sometimes groups will use a technique referred to as revealing and concealing in which they make it known that aggressive behaviors are happening and to whom, but they refuse to give a reason (Merten, 1997, p. 187). Allowing a victim to know why she is being aggressed against opens the aggressors up to being challenged and a rebuttal given. By keeping the reason for the aggressions from her, the aggressors are flaunting the divide that has been created between those in the know and the victim (Merten, 1997, p. 187). Another tactic that is sometimes used along with the revealing and concealing method, would be to focus on a social misstep and make it into a bigger deal than it would be if the balance had not been interrupted (Merten, 1997, p. 181). An example provided by Merten (1997), discusses a female that has physically changed and was considered to be more attractive and her social stock started to rise. This change in dynamic caused offense to her friends and