INT-211A
Reflection Paper.
Session 1 Journal.
Life for me has been a blend of good seasons and not-too-good seasons; and as it is expected, they come and go. But the interesting thing is that they leave behind lessons and wisdom to be gleaned if my mind is sensitive. I will say that, I am a product of the lessons I have learnt from my own life’s experiences, be they good or bad, or resulting from unwise decisions or sheer ignorance of mine. At the start of one of such experiences, is anger, blaming, resentments and withdrawals or sometimes excitement. But, along the line, God draws my attention to the very purpose for which He has allowed that pain or victory. At that point, the feeling am having changes from focusing on me to …show more content…
But one thing that will be always stand out will be put in short by this hymnal coined by William Spencer Walton: “in tenderness He sought me, weary and sick with sick. And on His shoulders brought me back to His fold again. Oh, the love that sought me, oh, the blood that bought me, oh. the grace that brought me to the fold. Wondrous grace that brought me to the fold”. It was after the loving and compassionate hands of God took hold of my life, that every piece of it began to make meaning. I look back sometimes with gratitude to God for allowing me go through these experiences so as to equip me for His course. And, for this privilege, I will be give the rest of my life to live for …show more content…
But as they say, it takes two to be married, I couldn’t make him stay. This experience devastated me. I was a working shadow of myself. I felt like running away to a place where no one knows me. The feeling of hurt, disappointment, abandonment, guilt, and shame was so overwhelming. There were some nights I thought I will be dead before morning. I stay awake most of the hours in the night trying to make sense of my situation that when I eventually wake up, I am so weak and uninterested about life. Sometimes, the only reason why I get up is to take care of my little 4-year-old daughter who did not deserve what was happening to her. I switched from blaming my husband and his family to heaping the whole blame upon myself and this action was the one thing that sucked life out of me. But, the good news is that, I was not too far from God’s word. God used His word to help me process my pains in the right way. His word let me know that there is a bigger picture and that nothing comes to God as a surprise. I was consoled by the fact that God is sovereign over the affairs of man. Although there were times I didn’t want to read His word or even pray. But His love never let me go. If I refused to read of pray, He makes everything I encounter in the curse of that day to become a ministration tool. He could even use my little girl as His tool to bring my attention back. Oh, that love that will not let me go, pure and holy