The event that propels my reflective journey into the world of process unfolds after a workshop on Dealing with Conduct and Anger issues of Adolescence.
The essay begins with a brief led up to the event and is majorly structured around the events of November 18, 2012. How a 5 a.m. emotional breakdown influenced my journey and then constructs towards an organismic experience. This essay then explores ideas of attachment, validation, and conditioning, Gestalt Therapy, Transactional Analysis and Person Centred.
Saturday, November 17, 2012.
9 a.m.
I sluggishly walked into the hall for the workshop and silently took my seat, as I felt a disconnect from my group members. As the workshop was organised for my Therapy Works process group, I was …show more content…
As I began to self actualize I began to question my experiences, my reality and my self structure. First time coming across being congruent with my self. The denied feeling of pain, the anguish, and the distorted images of abuse were no longer stifled by the self structure. As I began to organismically value my memories I began to feel the pain of growing up as if I was living it once-again in one mighty …show more content…
I was no longer distorting or denying my somatic experiencing and creating symbols within my Self Structure as Rogers proposed in his 11 proposition (19 Propositions). I began to own up to my own feelings - congruence began to set as I took responsibility of my Organismic Experiencing. My life long battle with stress, anxiety and depression were a result of denying and distortion of the reality. The Ideal Self and the Real Self were constantly in a struggle. My Phenomenal-Field had suppressed my Self Actualisation tendency, the Conditions of Worth had conquered my Organismic Valuing. I had grown up with Conditional Positive Regard and had learned to love myself only conditionally, there was mostly Conditional Positive Self Regard. With such a tight grid lock of an External Locus Evaluation my Locus of Experiencing was also determined by the external. My regard for my motivating force or the Self Actualising Drive, which I had swallowed whole from my Phenomenal-Field, was bleak. I spent a life time wanting to my organism to self-destruct, there were times when I even tried to
The essay begins with a brief led up to the event and is majorly structured around the events of November 18, 2012. How a 5 a.m. emotional breakdown influenced my journey and then constructs towards an organismic experience. This essay then explores ideas of attachment, validation, and conditioning, Gestalt Therapy, Transactional Analysis and Person Centred.
Saturday, November 17, 2012.
9 a.m.
I sluggishly walked into the hall for the workshop and silently took my seat, as I felt a disconnect from my group members. As the workshop was organised for my Therapy Works process group, I was …show more content…
As I began to self actualize I began to question my experiences, my reality and my self structure. First time coming across being congruent with my self. The denied feeling of pain, the anguish, and the distorted images of abuse were no longer stifled by the self structure. As I began to organismically value my memories I began to feel the pain of growing up as if I was living it once-again in one mighty …show more content…
I was no longer distorting or denying my somatic experiencing and creating symbols within my Self Structure as Rogers proposed in his 11 proposition (19 Propositions). I began to own up to my own feelings - congruence began to set as I took responsibility of my Organismic Experiencing. My life long battle with stress, anxiety and depression were a result of denying and distortion of the reality. The Ideal Self and the Real Self were constantly in a struggle. My Phenomenal-Field had suppressed my Self Actualisation tendency, the Conditions of Worth had conquered my Organismic Valuing. I had grown up with Conditional Positive Regard and had learned to love myself only conditionally, there was mostly Conditional Positive Self Regard. With such a tight grid lock of an External Locus Evaluation my Locus of Experiencing was also determined by the external. My regard for my motivating force or the Self Actualising Drive, which I had swallowed whole from my Phenomenal-Field, was bleak. I spent a life time wanting to my organism to self-destruct, there were times when I even tried to