Essay on Personal Narrative : The Iron Prison
Feeling as if I didn’t belong, like there were a thousand eyes staring me down, feeling almost inferior to everyone around me. As I look over I count, “one, two, three.” forty five pound plates; compared to my measly ten pounds it’s definitely laughable. I felt like everyone in my proximity was chuckling under their breath. Watching as my face began to light up bright red with immense, embarrassment as my frail arms began to shake under the force of the barbell. I would have laughed too. Entering a new environment like this made me overwhelmed and lost; without my veteran workout partner by my side, I would have been eaten alive. Eaten by the fear of failure. Eaten by the anxiety living inside me.
At this time in my life I cared. Not about anything, but everything. I wanted to be impressive, not just to me, but to my peers around me. I was beginning to be consumed from the inside out, fearing how my actions would mold my appearance to others around me. I woke up each morning wanting to impress someone else, not realizing I kept missing the single most important individual.
Walking into the gym it became rapidly apparent that everything was so new here compared to anything I had been used to. Loud grunts and slamming of weights echoed through the densely packed space. Was I supposed to follow suit and do exactly that just to fit in with this new society I had joined. It all seemed odd to me, my mind wanted me to run and flee back to where I belong because I…