Personal Narrative: My New Atheism

For 9 months now I've come to terms with my own new atheism; the world feels brand new. I have a thousand rose-colored memories of my childhood church, but all nostalgic aesthetics aside, I can't help but acknowledge the negativity I experienced as a Christian. Suppression of my curiosity and my passion for humanism was routine, as my church seemed to consistently devalue and demonize human nature. When I was younger, I'd ask God to grant me everything I felt I couldn't attain myself: intelligence, financial comfort, consistent sobriety for my mother- essentially freedom from all difficulty. I felt I had no power over these things in my life and that I needed God to fix them up for me. When he didn't, I felt betrayed and confused. My head told me that I'd been coaxed into complacency, but my conditioned heart told me that God was there, listening to my blasphemous thoughts. The loss of faith really began with asking the forbidden question, "Why can't God seem to hear me like they said he could and would?" As I grew older, my reasoning for doubt grew more sophisticated. I'd began to think, "I feel the same connection with the singer at a concert that I do with God at church and what about all the scientific evidence?" I didn't really know what I believed in, and that facilitated the explosion of my appreciation for …show more content…
Its ability to be relevant to anyone at anytime is special to me. Growing up, I lived with 6 different families as my mom struggled through her 20-year-long crack cocaine addiction. All of the families, some relatives, some strangers, were of different socio-economic backgrounds and lived different lifestyles- different realities. Those experiences help me to understand politics in ways those who grew up in one "socio-economic category" can't. That exposure developed my ability to adapt, and has strengthened my confidence in my own