Personal Narrative: My Life As A Lesbian

I've come to realize that being a lesbian is a big part of who I am. It's not all that I am, but it's a single word that succinctly describes an otherwise mysterious part of myself, and it comes with an entire culture. It might seem like an arbitrary trait to focus so heavily on, but I think many people don't realize what a big role their orientation plays in their lives. Humans naturally want to understand themselves, but that was hard for me in a society that allows little flexibility in regards to gender and sexuality. Growing up with that pressure added to the feeling that my true self was buried under piles of assumptions and expectations, and it took a lot of digging to unearth it.
I believe sexuality and romantic alignments change as people themselves change; it's a complex and fluid experience, like any form of …show more content…
I found myself able to develop feelings towards boys, but only if they were fictional, famous, or otherwise completely unattainable. Keeping boys at a distance like this let me maintain the illusion of heterosexuality to myself and others. It wasn't until about six months ago that I realized that might be unusual for girls who are genuinely interested in relationships with boys. I didn't feel any similar discomfort when I realized I like girls, which just helped reaffirm that I was heading in the right direction.
My worry was that I won't be bringing a man home to my parents like they've always expected, and their grandchildren will likely be dogs. I'm lucky enough to have accepting parents, but even so, I'm still not ready to come out to my family yet. The majority of southerners seem to share a negative opinion of gay people, so living in the south for most of my life has made it harder for me to open up about this part of myself. I felt like I owed the world what it expected of me. But forcing myself to be something I'm not doesn't even help the world, it just harms