Personal Narrative: Mourning Traditions

Each Sunday for eight weeks, out of respect for the mourning traditions of Vietnamese Buddhists, my family and I spent two hours at the Chua Tu Lam Temple in San Jose to pray for the safety and happiness of my grandfather in heaven. In spite of the ritual, I couldn’t mourn my grandfather. My too-recent memories of him only brought tears to my eyes, and I worried that this would depress my family further. As my parents knelt with folded hands, I forced myself to shove my emotions deeper inside.
Throughout this period of mourning, and for two additional months, I constantly lied to myself about the pain. I told myself that nothing would interfere with my motivation at school; when my grades declined on math tests, I convinced myself it was a …show more content…
The image of my grandfather on the altar reminded me of how I had survived a life-changing event and grown stronger. I have found that the sharing of pain does not hurt the listener; it gives everyone the chance to learn from others’ experiences and to connect. To my surprise, I found that my parents also became less stressed when I was able to talk to them about my feelings, as this allowed them to feel useful in helping me find solutions. The sense of ease I regained cannot be described as analogous to any other emotion. I felt …show more content…
Before this experience, I had only straightforward goals for myself. By having to confront my emotions, I discovered other dimensions to myself. I found that my sense of humor was a great resource for coping with challenges. I also found myself drawn to work with children, who relate very differently than adults to their feelings. The joy I gained from communicating with my peers brought me not to my old self, but one willing to put better effort into life. Through this experience, I have learned that confronting difficulties with honesty and openness allows for