I've mentioned that I changed myself a lot through middle school and even my freshman year of high school, in order to get other people to like me.
Allow me to set the scene; it's eighth grade, and two of my closest friends have entered what you might call an "emo phase." They've discovered the joys of tumblr, SuperWhoLock, and Hot Topic. Panic! At the Disco, Fall Out Boy, Paramore, My Chemical Romance- these bands all become staples, favorites, and suddenly they're going to concerts left and right. At first, I tried to ignore it, but as my best friend began to slip into it as well, I was terrified they would all leave me.
Now, don't get me wrong; if you like tumblr (I know I do), or SuperWhoLock, or Hot Topic, or any of the bands I mentioned …show more content…
And by the end of freshman year, everything was falling apart. I ended up in therapy; I am still in therapy. And it took six months- six months- and an hour and a half session about my past and how I had come to be who I was that ended in my crying, for me to take my best friend's advice. Up until that point, whenever I thought about what Julie had did, I'd felt bitter and resentful, betrayed and distrustful. Now when I think about it, I feel nothing. I've overcome a lot of the insecurities that have been instilled from middle school, which might've helped, but really, I've come to understand that I was a pretty awful person in eighth grade too. And now, having dealt with having depression and anxiety myself, I'm more sympathetic to where she was, and I couldn't be prouder of the strong young woman she's become. Listen to me, I sound like a grandmother. But when you see someone grow and change in such a positive way in just a few short years, it's hard not …show more content…
I mean sure, it's uplifting, and you overcame your challenges, but what's the point?
Incredibly, I'm tying this back to fashion. Hear me out.
A few days ago, I went shopping with my two best friends. There's a nice mall in our area, and we got ourselves some Starbucks and just wandered around. We stopped in a Lush, we got some jewellry, wandered around Sephora. But most importantly, we went into Forever 21, and tried on a bunch of clothes together.
In eighth and ninth grade, I wore a lot of black. Two days ago, I left the store with a bag full of color; yellow, red, pink, teal. That's how you know you're getting better- you don't always feel it, but it's in the fact that you sing again when you're doing chores, or that you're reading new and exciting books for fun again, or that you're getting the right amount of sleep, or in that you're buying colorful, happy clothing again.
If you're not at this point just yet, that's okay. Because even Julie, who had the lowest low point of anyone I've ever known, is there now. Besides, I didn't give up black; I've just been colored a little
Allow me to set the scene; it's eighth grade, and two of my closest friends have entered what you might call an "emo phase." They've discovered the joys of tumblr, SuperWhoLock, and Hot Topic. Panic! At the Disco, Fall Out Boy, Paramore, My Chemical Romance- these bands all become staples, favorites, and suddenly they're going to concerts left and right. At first, I tried to ignore it, but as my best friend began to slip into it as well, I was terrified they would all leave me.
Now, don't get me wrong; if you like tumblr (I know I do), or SuperWhoLock, or Hot Topic, or any of the bands I mentioned …show more content…
And by the end of freshman year, everything was falling apart. I ended up in therapy; I am still in therapy. And it took six months- six months- and an hour and a half session about my past and how I had come to be who I was that ended in my crying, for me to take my best friend's advice. Up until that point, whenever I thought about what Julie had did, I'd felt bitter and resentful, betrayed and distrustful. Now when I think about it, I feel nothing. I've overcome a lot of the insecurities that have been instilled from middle school, which might've helped, but really, I've come to understand that I was a pretty awful person in eighth grade too. And now, having dealt with having depression and anxiety myself, I'm more sympathetic to where she was, and I couldn't be prouder of the strong young woman she's become. Listen to me, I sound like a grandmother. But when you see someone grow and change in such a positive way in just a few short years, it's hard not …show more content…
I mean sure, it's uplifting, and you overcame your challenges, but what's the point?
Incredibly, I'm tying this back to fashion. Hear me out.
A few days ago, I went shopping with my two best friends. There's a nice mall in our area, and we got ourselves some Starbucks and just wandered around. We stopped in a Lush, we got some jewellry, wandered around Sephora. But most importantly, we went into Forever 21, and tried on a bunch of clothes together.
In eighth and ninth grade, I wore a lot of black. Two days ago, I left the store with a bag full of color; yellow, red, pink, teal. That's how you know you're getting better- you don't always feel it, but it's in the fact that you sing again when you're doing chores, or that you're reading new and exciting books for fun again, or that you're getting the right amount of sleep, or in that you're buying colorful, happy clothing again.
If you're not at this point just yet, that's okay. Because even Julie, who had the lowest low point of anyone I've ever known, is there now. Besides, I didn't give up black; I've just been colored a little