At 15 years old, I remember being on the floor of my house with a pill bottle and the 12 pills that were inside of me. I remembered that I was crying, I remember the knife that I had in my other hand, wondering If the blood meant something. It was a moment in my life that I will always remember because I had experienced a breakdown, that taught me a lot about how things really can change you. Alcoholism is a terrible sickness that takes a completely normal person, and makes them monsters. Having a parent who had this disease, didn’t make it easier. I broke down every week, having days where all I did was cry. I felt hatred towards everyone who had a “good life”. I watched old tv shows and wished that I could be that girl, the girl who always
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I remember it, but i can’t really understand why those things had to happen. The aftermath left me with anxiety and depression, which is the worst.I felt like I wasn’t understood, and that people misjudged me because I was quiet. The reality was that I felt like “a lamb to the slaughter” when people were staring at me, I almost felt like they were secretly talking about me. I didn’t feel good during those moments of my life. I was losing myself and no one understood that. After that, I came back home very indifferent from my situation. I felt that I should have feelings about what happened to me because of everything that I really went through, never feeling the Importance of what really happened until after I came home. I felt that I could possibly be different after my experience, and that it might teach me about what living was all about. I remember looking at the sky and wishing I was a bird so I could fly anywhere I wanted. I wanted to promise myself that this experience would change me and I might feel better about who I was. I always had a dream that one day in my life, I would experience a miracle. I wanted to learn from this moment and that’s what I did, I learned. I tried to do better things with my life and even though the bad things still happened, I always dreamed about that miracle that would hopefully one time would happen to
I remember it, but i can’t really understand why those things had to happen. The aftermath left me with anxiety and depression, which is the worst.I felt like I wasn’t understood, and that people misjudged me because I was quiet. The reality was that I felt like “a lamb to the slaughter” when people were staring at me, I almost felt like they were secretly talking about me. I didn’t feel good during those moments of my life. I was losing myself and no one understood that. After that, I came back home very indifferent from my situation. I felt that I should have feelings about what happened to me because of everything that I really went through, never feeling the Importance of what really happened until after I came home. I felt that I could possibly be different after my experience, and that it might teach me about what living was all about. I remember looking at the sky and wishing I was a bird so I could fly anywhere I wanted. I wanted to promise myself that this experience would change me and I might feel better about who I was. I always had a dream that one day in my life, I would experience a miracle. I wanted to learn from this moment and that’s what I did, I learned. I tried to do better things with my life and even though the bad things still happened, I always dreamed about that miracle that would hopefully one time would happen to