Walking through the living room of my house to our kitchen, I say goodbye to my dad, brother, and my brother’s friend as they leave to go out to the movies. I pass my by my shriveled up emaciated uncle on the way to the fridge- he’s dying and has been for 29 years. AIDS is a death sentence, and as the family member of someone who has AIDS, you can either accept that they’re going to die and numb yourself, or you can deny their inevitable fate and cause yourself mass amounts of emotional distress when it finally happens. When I learned that my uncle had AIDS I chose to protect my emotions as best as I could by accepting the fact that he probably wouldn’t live long enough to even see me graduate high school. I was right. I get to the fridge,
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He has to go to the bathroom every two hours. He can’t get to the bathroom on his own. I can’t help him to the bathroom. He’s stubborn; he’ll try to go on his own. I’m five feet tall and 95 lbs; if he falls I can’t help him. I can’t let him fall. You promised you wouldn’t leave me alone with him. You promised.
I’ve given up arguing, she won’t listen. She won’t believe my logic. “Fine. Go ahead and go but be back as soon as possible. Please.”
I go to my room and close the door. Shutting out my mom, my uncle, and my worries. Maybe if I stay in here I can pretend no one’s home and I’m all alone. Later, I hear my mom yell “Bye Syd!” and the garage door slam. It’s just me and Uncle Tony now. Please God, don’t let him get hurt on my watch.
I start playing music and doing my homework- attempting to ignore my anxiety and fear. Half an hour passes by and right as I’m trying to figure out how aqueous sodium sulfate and concentrated barium chloride solution react I hear exactly what I’ve been dreading all …show more content…
I refuse to talk to her because if I do the tears will come back. All I do is retreat to my bedroom, where I once covered my anxiety, I now cover my feelings of failure.
At this time in my life, I doubted everything. I didn’t think I could accomplish anything or do anything correctly, and this night just seemed to prove that. But, now that night has gone and past, I have realized that, as someone who has struggled with anxiety for nine years, making it through that night was an accomplishment all in its own. Though I could not handle the situation on my own, I was able to make it through with the help of others- even after having to problem solve to contact my mom.
Thanks to this night, and my uncle in general, I feel as though if I push myself (even if it’s to my breaking point) I will accomplish what I want to. This is why I have been inspired to pursue a career in medicine; I have always wanted to help people and now I have the confidence that I can push myself, become a doctor, and help someone like my
He has to go to the bathroom every two hours. He can’t get to the bathroom on his own. I can’t help him to the bathroom. He’s stubborn; he’ll try to go on his own. I’m five feet tall and 95 lbs; if he falls I can’t help him. I can’t let him fall. You promised you wouldn’t leave me alone with him. You promised.
I’ve given up arguing, she won’t listen. She won’t believe my logic. “Fine. Go ahead and go but be back as soon as possible. Please.”
I go to my room and close the door. Shutting out my mom, my uncle, and my worries. Maybe if I stay in here I can pretend no one’s home and I’m all alone. Later, I hear my mom yell “Bye Syd!” and the garage door slam. It’s just me and Uncle Tony now. Please God, don’t let him get hurt on my watch.
I start playing music and doing my homework- attempting to ignore my anxiety and fear. Half an hour passes by and right as I’m trying to figure out how aqueous sodium sulfate and concentrated barium chloride solution react I hear exactly what I’ve been dreading all …show more content…
I refuse to talk to her because if I do the tears will come back. All I do is retreat to my bedroom, where I once covered my anxiety, I now cover my feelings of failure.
At this time in my life, I doubted everything. I didn’t think I could accomplish anything or do anything correctly, and this night just seemed to prove that. But, now that night has gone and past, I have realized that, as someone who has struggled with anxiety for nine years, making it through that night was an accomplishment all in its own. Though I could not handle the situation on my own, I was able to make it through with the help of others- even after having to problem solve to contact my mom.
Thanks to this night, and my uncle in general, I feel as though if I push myself (even if it’s to my breaking point) I will accomplish what I want to. This is why I have been inspired to pursue a career in medicine; I have always wanted to help people and now I have the confidence that I can push myself, become a doctor, and help someone like my