Snowdrop
1998.
“…Certainly, since I was a child, I wasn’t particularly healthy…”
But even so, I went to school. During summer vacation, I played outside until my skin was tanned dark.
June, middle school. The day after we ordered swimsuits. That was the first time I was admitted to hospital. Just before the first semester midterms, a day where the rain that started to fall felt awfully cold.
In the midst of that pure white sky of the rainy season, in the beginning, everyone from school came to visit me each day. And when I was discharged, during the weekends, they would come to my house to play.
…But, that was just the beginning.
Autumn came, winter left. Hospitalised, discharged, outpatient care… and then hospitalisation again. Classmates …show more content…
I turned back and watched the tall white flowers sway in the breeze, the white petals like silk looked smooth and soft. There was an air of tranquillity, a peacefulness, and closing my eyes I felt safe, calm. In my mind I pictured myself lying on one of those hills looking up into clear skies. Yet, there was also a feeling of sadness. The petals reminded me of the white vinyl bracelet around my wrist. As the gentle white skies of tranquillity were dirtied by the dark black clouds of reality, I turned to face the girl, and the moment of peaceful silence passed.
“Do you want to go there?”
When no response came, I assumed one wouldn’t. But as I began to turn my eyes back to the television screen the girl turned to face me. It was the first time that our gaze had met. Her eyes stared into mine, and mine into hers. Her eyelids hung low, as if she was tired, and her gaze lay softly on me. But those eyes told me nothing. There was no emotion, no expression, nothing.
“Do you..?”
Startled by her sudden response, all I could do was shrug. After a minute or so, I replied in words.
“I don’t want home either. Nor do I want here. I don’t know where I want… but I want
1998.
“…Certainly, since I was a child, I wasn’t particularly healthy…”
But even so, I went to school. During summer vacation, I played outside until my skin was tanned dark.
June, middle school. The day after we ordered swimsuits. That was the first time I was admitted to hospital. Just before the first semester midterms, a day where the rain that started to fall felt awfully cold.
In the midst of that pure white sky of the rainy season, in the beginning, everyone from school came to visit me each day. And when I was discharged, during the weekends, they would come to my house to play.
…But, that was just the beginning.
Autumn came, winter left. Hospitalised, discharged, outpatient care… and then hospitalisation again. Classmates …show more content…
I turned back and watched the tall white flowers sway in the breeze, the white petals like silk looked smooth and soft. There was an air of tranquillity, a peacefulness, and closing my eyes I felt safe, calm. In my mind I pictured myself lying on one of those hills looking up into clear skies. Yet, there was also a feeling of sadness. The petals reminded me of the white vinyl bracelet around my wrist. As the gentle white skies of tranquillity were dirtied by the dark black clouds of reality, I turned to face the girl, and the moment of peaceful silence passed.
“Do you want to go there?”
When no response came, I assumed one wouldn’t. But as I began to turn my eyes back to the television screen the girl turned to face me. It was the first time that our gaze had met. Her eyes stared into mine, and mine into hers. Her eyelids hung low, as if she was tired, and her gaze lay softly on me. But those eyes told me nothing. There was no emotion, no expression, nothing.
“Do you..?”
Startled by her sudden response, all I could do was shrug. After a minute or so, I replied in words.
“I don’t want home either. Nor do I want here. I don’t know where I want… but I want