The next time I attended a camp at CRG it was just me and my two other siblings. My parents and Anthony were left at home. This time, when I stepped onto the campsite, there was no snow and it was warm enough to wear shorts and a t-shirt, but I was nervous to be attending Sibling Camp for the very first time. Without Holland, who was also attending the camp, it would have taken longer to break away from my shyness. She had already known most of the kids our age and it made it easier to make new friends. As camp went on, Holland and I became closer and I was able to share how I felt with her more openly. I realized as time went on that she did not feel sorry for me, but she just understood how I felt because she had felt the same way. I felt
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I was able to hang out without me having to feel like an outcast. I only started going back to my old ways when Anthony had passed away. I stopped going to school for a whole week because I did not know how to deal with my emotions and I just could not believe it; I did not want to believe it. Carolyn, the author of Coping With Loss, expressed how I truly felt: “Denial. Most people's first reaction to a loss is denial. A teen whose mother is diagnosed with breast cancer may say, "The doctor must be wrong." Many of the teens at Columbine High School told themselves that the shooting wasn't happening. Donna Hahn, 15, lost her mother when she was 10. "I acted like I didn't care," she says. "I didn't even cry. For about a year I didn't want anyone to see how I felt."” I had crawled right back into the shell I was in before Camp Rainbow Gold and with my friends from CRG being spread throughout Idaho, meeting up with all of them was almost impossible. When I was unable to see my CRG friends, I would begin to feel self conscious around my peers and even around my family once again. No one was allowed to know how I was handling the situation or how I felt. It was not until I realized that instead of seeing my CRG friends I could resort to
I was able to hang out without me having to feel like an outcast. I only started going back to my old ways when Anthony had passed away. I stopped going to school for a whole week because I did not know how to deal with my emotions and I just could not believe it; I did not want to believe it. Carolyn, the author of Coping With Loss, expressed how I truly felt: “Denial. Most people's first reaction to a loss is denial. A teen whose mother is diagnosed with breast cancer may say, "The doctor must be wrong." Many of the teens at Columbine High School told themselves that the shooting wasn't happening. Donna Hahn, 15, lost her mother when she was 10. "I acted like I didn't care," she says. "I didn't even cry. For about a year I didn't want anyone to see how I felt."” I had crawled right back into the shell I was in before Camp Rainbow Gold and with my friends from CRG being spread throughout Idaho, meeting up with all of them was almost impossible. When I was unable to see my CRG friends, I would begin to feel self conscious around my peers and even around my family once again. No one was allowed to know how I was handling the situation or how I felt. It was not until I realized that instead of seeing my CRG friends I could resort to