Some people say that you must reach the lowest point before you find out who you are. The choices that you make from that point are just stepping stones to the bigger picture. Fear is just an illusion, it does not define anybody or what they believe in. Loss can create great sorrow and beauty mixed into one. All these emotions are like a double-edged sword. They can momentarily destroy the person you are and everything that you have ever known. However, once someone gets past that point, they can help build a person into who they are and cement their dreams, goals and future. Many people are afraid of change and my biggest fear is and was losing someone that I love. My father passed away from Stage IV prostate cancer that metastasized to
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Every day seemed the same. It started at six in the morning, I was always in a rush to get myself ready for work and to get Ares ready for daycare. My job didn’t help distract my mind from the thoughts, it was an order entry job at a local conveyor company. The thoughts that nagged at me in the back of my mind weren’t pleasant ones. Would today be the day he dies? Am I going to be at work when it happens? Will my father die tonight when I’m alone with him? What will I do if it does happen? My mind constantly churned with these thoughts and my work performance started to falter. As soon as the five-o-clock bell rang, I was out the door and on my way to pick up Ares so that I could just drop him off to John. Another day with my child gone. The nights varied in length, some nights I would leave at twelve. Other nights, I would leave a little before the sun started to rise in the sky. I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t sleep, my father’s declining health became an obsession. I neglected my own health in the process. My boyfriend did a majority of the housework and child-rearing in our apartment. John tried his best to cheer me up. No matter what time I arrived home, he would tell me that everything was going to be okay. This became our ritual of sorts, I would cry and he held me. On weekends, he would take …show more content…
John and I have grown and changed together. We have taken on a more proactive role as spouses, parents and each other’s biggest supporters. Our love has matured and flourished as we have. My biggest fear of losing someone that I love came true, yet it helped me develop into who I am today. The lesson that I learned from all this is to never give up on yourself. If you do, the right people in your life will remind you of the dreams and ambitions that you set for yourself, no matter which circumstances arise. You are a person and that is valid. A fire has been rekindled in me and it has helped forge my path into being the person that I want to become. I lost someone dear to me. Loss and facing your biggest fear are not always bad things. It is the path that you choose from that point that will define and create who you
Every day seemed the same. It started at six in the morning, I was always in a rush to get myself ready for work and to get Ares ready for daycare. My job didn’t help distract my mind from the thoughts, it was an order entry job at a local conveyor company. The thoughts that nagged at me in the back of my mind weren’t pleasant ones. Would today be the day he dies? Am I going to be at work when it happens? Will my father die tonight when I’m alone with him? What will I do if it does happen? My mind constantly churned with these thoughts and my work performance started to falter. As soon as the five-o-clock bell rang, I was out the door and on my way to pick up Ares so that I could just drop him off to John. Another day with my child gone. The nights varied in length, some nights I would leave at twelve. Other nights, I would leave a little before the sun started to rise in the sky. I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t sleep, my father’s declining health became an obsession. I neglected my own health in the process. My boyfriend did a majority of the housework and child-rearing in our apartment. John tried his best to cheer me up. No matter what time I arrived home, he would tell me that everything was going to be okay. This became our ritual of sorts, I would cry and he held me. On weekends, he would take …show more content…
John and I have grown and changed together. We have taken on a more proactive role as spouses, parents and each other’s biggest supporters. Our love has matured and flourished as we have. My biggest fear of losing someone that I love came true, yet it helped me develop into who I am today. The lesson that I learned from all this is to never give up on yourself. If you do, the right people in your life will remind you of the dreams and ambitions that you set for yourself, no matter which circumstances arise. You are a person and that is valid. A fire has been rekindled in me and it has helped forge my path into being the person that I want to become. I lost someone dear to me. Loss and facing your biggest fear are not always bad things. It is the path that you choose from that point that will define and create who you