Rape Culture
Rape culture, I at first thought that this term was coined by man hating feminists, trying to blame men for the abuses against women. But, after taking this class and reading the material provided I now realize this is indeed a culture. It is how society acts towards, and its situations in which sexual assault, rape and general violence are ignored, trivialized, normalized or made into joke (Ridgeway, 2014). Or to simplify, that we as a society are more desensitized to sex and acts thereof, because of media, movies and lyrics of music, that promote violence against women. I am guilty of listening and dancing to the music of those artists and reading “harmless grey books”. I am just as desensitized as the rest of the world, and …show more content…
I hounded them about safety, where are you at, who are you with, what are you doing. I thought, I was doing my job as a mother to raise up strong, independent smart girls who were knowledgeable about boys, and it was their responsibility to keep themselves safe. But, I put all the pressure on them, and now I realize because of this would they have come to me if something went wrong? My daughter was involved in (what I now know) was a sexually coercive relationship, she never once came to us for help. Not until the relationship ended did we realize the extent or coercion and pressure for sex. She still continues to verbalize the attitude, “I could have said no, or been stronger” “it was my choice”, but was it really, after taking this class, I see it differently. But, because of our culture, she takes the blame for not being strong enough to withstand the pressure for sex. I think we define abuse as leaving evidence, in order to prove we need physical evidence bruises, broken bones and lose sight of the emotional aspect. But, my daughter was the victim of emotional, verbal and sexual coercion from a boy, a boy I cooked dinner for and took on family vacations. …show more content…
This mentality has evolved and women buy into the concept of “she was asking for it” by her actions. I interviewed several college age students that live on campuses throughout Washington State, and here is the answers that they gave. I asked, have you had ever heard of any reported rapes on campus while you attended, they all answered “no”. I then asked where there places or parties that you didn’t go to because of the reputation of boys attending, they answered “oh yes there are different fraternity’s that have “rowdier boys” and you must be careful if you party with them. They, then instructed me on how they take in their own beverages and never accept drinks from house members. This was very matter a fact for them and they felt, it is their responsibility to keep themselves and each other safe. The girls all expressed, yes it not right for a guy to take advantage of girls, but she should have been more careful, and that viewpoint is coming from girls. One, even stated that kids go to college, join sorority and fraternity’s to party and have fun, and if you pick a wild partying school, what do you expect. I was astounded that this view of rape culture was coming from girls, they have bought into the same idea that society has. It’s it the girls fault, not once did hold the boys responsible for their actions. On one campus, girls that live in certain housing all have
Rape culture, I at first thought that this term was coined by man hating feminists, trying to blame men for the abuses against women. But, after taking this class and reading the material provided I now realize this is indeed a culture. It is how society acts towards, and its situations in which sexual assault, rape and general violence are ignored, trivialized, normalized or made into joke (Ridgeway, 2014). Or to simplify, that we as a society are more desensitized to sex and acts thereof, because of media, movies and lyrics of music, that promote violence against women. I am guilty of listening and dancing to the music of those artists and reading “harmless grey books”. I am just as desensitized as the rest of the world, and …show more content…
I hounded them about safety, where are you at, who are you with, what are you doing. I thought, I was doing my job as a mother to raise up strong, independent smart girls who were knowledgeable about boys, and it was their responsibility to keep themselves safe. But, I put all the pressure on them, and now I realize because of this would they have come to me if something went wrong? My daughter was involved in (what I now know) was a sexually coercive relationship, she never once came to us for help. Not until the relationship ended did we realize the extent or coercion and pressure for sex. She still continues to verbalize the attitude, “I could have said no, or been stronger” “it was my choice”, but was it really, after taking this class, I see it differently. But, because of our culture, she takes the blame for not being strong enough to withstand the pressure for sex. I think we define abuse as leaving evidence, in order to prove we need physical evidence bruises, broken bones and lose sight of the emotional aspect. But, my daughter was the victim of emotional, verbal and sexual coercion from a boy, a boy I cooked dinner for and took on family vacations. …show more content…
This mentality has evolved and women buy into the concept of “she was asking for it” by her actions. I interviewed several college age students that live on campuses throughout Washington State, and here is the answers that they gave. I asked, have you had ever heard of any reported rapes on campus while you attended, they all answered “no”. I then asked where there places or parties that you didn’t go to because of the reputation of boys attending, they answered “oh yes there are different fraternity’s that have “rowdier boys” and you must be careful if you party with them. They, then instructed me on how they take in their own beverages and never accept drinks from house members. This was very matter a fact for them and they felt, it is their responsibility to keep themselves and each other safe. The girls all expressed, yes it not right for a guy to take advantage of girls, but she should have been more careful, and that viewpoint is coming from girls. One, even stated that kids go to college, join sorority and fraternity’s to party and have fun, and if you pick a wild partying school, what do you expect. I was astounded that this view of rape culture was coming from girls, they have bought into the same idea that society has. It’s it the girls fault, not once did hold the boys responsible for their actions. On one campus, girls that live in certain housing all have