I’ve kept the nectar in my arm a secret from everyone, even Connor. He’s hinted that he knows I’m hiding something, but I know that he wouldn’t approve of me keeping it. Although, this really is a special case. He knows my plan and having nectar with me will definitely help with it. Three weeks before our planned day of escape, I finally ask him to meet me in my cell. I need to tell him.
I fidget with the golden container, waiting for him to arrive. He’s normally so prompt, but I’ve been waiting for at least ten minutes. That’s more than enough time for him to get here from anywhere in the prison. It’s probably just nerves making me so impatient. He can take as long as he wants, but it sure gives me a long time to think about all of this.
“This …show more content…
I’ve managed to leave it in my arm up till now, if only to avoid doing something stupid. Now that it’s in my hand, I can feel the darkness within the shiny case calling me. The mere memories the nectar provokes makes my heart race with feral excitement. The power is intoxicating.
Without thinking, I pop the thing open and allow the tablets to roll onto my hand. There are more than one would expect to fit in the small container, but I’m not surprised. I see the golden flecks of the warden’s second-rate nectar. Red in the stronger stuff, subdued only by dehydration. Purple winks at me from my own creation, a personal mix I made to prevent the memory loss associated with ordinary nectar. It has some other neat tricks and benefits, but I’m sure we’ll have time for that later.
There is one version that I don’t recognize, though. The blue flecks within them fill me with curiosity. I’ve never seen this before. With this kind of thing, new is dangerous. Especially when the new thing is a present from Cross.
I end up rolling all of them back into the case with the blue ones on the bottom. I would hate to accidentally take one of them when I’m going for something else. Notice how I’m not acting like I won’t end up taking them. I’m not stupid. I’m just waiting to get out of general population before I cross that …show more content…
I know I already told you that, earlier, but but you can’t tell them no matter what. Not when they call me a traitor, not when I act like one. If Cross suspects me for a second...” I trail off, frowning. I can’t look at him, but I see him nod in the corner of my eye. “The real game is about to start. If a little deception will win it faster, I’m sure you can handle it.”
“Can you?”
I look up sharply, catching him before he can hide his uncertainty. I avert my eyes again, not wanting to admit that I’m not sure either. Can I do this? I guess there’s only one way to find out. I tell him as much, but he gently turns my face back towards him. He leans close, studying my face.
“You know that you can end this whenever you want to, right? You can stop this game if it gets to be too much. Destroying this world would be child’s play for you.” He sighs, pressing his forehead against mine. “I won’t tell them. But only if you promise not to get in over your head. Don’t stay here just because you think you have to. You could have us back at your house acting like this never happened with a wave of your hand. Don’t forget that.”
“I know. I’ll end this whole thing if I need to.” He leans back, but raises an eyebrow. I nod. “If I want to,” I concede, “I’ll end it if I want
I fidget with the golden container, waiting for him to arrive. He’s normally so prompt, but I’ve been waiting for at least ten minutes. That’s more than enough time for him to get here from anywhere in the prison. It’s probably just nerves making me so impatient. He can take as long as he wants, but it sure gives me a long time to think about all of this.
“This …show more content…
I’ve managed to leave it in my arm up till now, if only to avoid doing something stupid. Now that it’s in my hand, I can feel the darkness within the shiny case calling me. The mere memories the nectar provokes makes my heart race with feral excitement. The power is intoxicating.
Without thinking, I pop the thing open and allow the tablets to roll onto my hand. There are more than one would expect to fit in the small container, but I’m not surprised. I see the golden flecks of the warden’s second-rate nectar. Red in the stronger stuff, subdued only by dehydration. Purple winks at me from my own creation, a personal mix I made to prevent the memory loss associated with ordinary nectar. It has some other neat tricks and benefits, but I’m sure we’ll have time for that later.
There is one version that I don’t recognize, though. The blue flecks within them fill me with curiosity. I’ve never seen this before. With this kind of thing, new is dangerous. Especially when the new thing is a present from Cross.
I end up rolling all of them back into the case with the blue ones on the bottom. I would hate to accidentally take one of them when I’m going for something else. Notice how I’m not acting like I won’t end up taking them. I’m not stupid. I’m just waiting to get out of general population before I cross that …show more content…
I know I already told you that, earlier, but but you can’t tell them no matter what. Not when they call me a traitor, not when I act like one. If Cross suspects me for a second...” I trail off, frowning. I can’t look at him, but I see him nod in the corner of my eye. “The real game is about to start. If a little deception will win it faster, I’m sure you can handle it.”
“Can you?”
I look up sharply, catching him before he can hide his uncertainty. I avert my eyes again, not wanting to admit that I’m not sure either. Can I do this? I guess there’s only one way to find out. I tell him as much, but he gently turns my face back towards him. He leans close, studying my face.
“You know that you can end this whenever you want to, right? You can stop this game if it gets to be too much. Destroying this world would be child’s play for you.” He sighs, pressing his forehead against mine. “I won’t tell them. But only if you promise not to get in over your head. Don’t stay here just because you think you have to. You could have us back at your house acting like this never happened with a wave of your hand. Don’t forget that.”
“I know. I’ll end this whole thing if I need to.” He leans back, but raises an eyebrow. I nod. “If I want to,” I concede, “I’ll end it if I want