I was born Jewish, I had no say over it. At age 5 I began a lifelong journey of discovering Judaism and my belief in god. I began this journey by being enrolled at Seattle Jewish Community School. Kindergarten began with learning to write my name in Hebrew and learning the holiday train, the basic fundamentals. This basic understanding of Judaism continued through 5th grade as I explored the different ways I can be Jewish in my future. The majority of the time we were told—to some extent—what to believe and what is fact about Judaism. In third grade our teacher, Morah Amee asked us to draw g-d. This assignment baffled me as a child, because I still wasn’t sure if I believed in g-d, let alone knew what he or she looked like. Of course I drew
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Not surprisingly, I still didn’t have an answer for this baffling question. I was confused why this is such a centric question in Reform Judaism, when theoretically Reform Jews were slowly drifting from classic Judaism. So I continued to push that question further away from me, still not seeing how I can make a statement about such a complex belief. As I prepared for my Bat-Mitzvah I continued to wrestle with my belief in god, mostly in discussions at Hebrew school or with my tutor. Because I felt such disconnect to this theoretical god figure I consequently felt disconnected to services and my general overall Judaism. I hated every Tuesday night religious school services, I despised going to services of any type. After your bat mitzvah you have the chance to stop attending Hebrew School. I wrestled with that choice for a while, debating whether it was worth the time, effort, and would I ever enjoy it again? When I decided to stick with Hebrew school for eighth grade I wasn’t thrilled with my own decision, but I toughed it out. The choice to stay enrolled at Hebrew school is potentially one of the most important choices I made. Regardless of the intense disconnect I had to services and Judaism for that period of time, I still had lots of role models and friends at Hebrew school, so I semi-enjoyed it. I got through the majority of that years Hebrew school classes with minimal interest, still hating services and
Not surprisingly, I still didn’t have an answer for this baffling question. I was confused why this is such a centric question in Reform Judaism, when theoretically Reform Jews were slowly drifting from classic Judaism. So I continued to push that question further away from me, still not seeing how I can make a statement about such a complex belief. As I prepared for my Bat-Mitzvah I continued to wrestle with my belief in god, mostly in discussions at Hebrew school or with my tutor. Because I felt such disconnect to this theoretical god figure I consequently felt disconnected to services and my general overall Judaism. I hated every Tuesday night religious school services, I despised going to services of any type. After your bat mitzvah you have the chance to stop attending Hebrew School. I wrestled with that choice for a while, debating whether it was worth the time, effort, and would I ever enjoy it again? When I decided to stick with Hebrew school for eighth grade I wasn’t thrilled with my own decision, but I toughed it out. The choice to stay enrolled at Hebrew school is potentially one of the most important choices I made. Regardless of the intense disconnect I had to services and Judaism for that period of time, I still had lots of role models and friends at Hebrew school, so I semi-enjoyed it. I got through the majority of that years Hebrew school classes with minimal interest, still hating services and