In my ethnographic research I will be using relationship rules to further understand how and why connections structure and dismantle themselves. Relationship rules are “principles that prescribe appropriate communication and behavior within friendship relationships” (Argyle and Henderson, 1984)), an extension of relational maintenance. Proper application of these rules generally determines a happy friendship from an unhappy one, being universal principles regardless of gender or culture. The tasks include showing support, seeking support, respecting privacy, keeping confidences, defending your friends, avoiding public criticism, making your friends happy, managing jealousy, shared humor, and maintaining equity. I’ll be applying the ideals of
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I don’t value the relationship; therefore, I actively choose to not make him happy by reciprocating the contact. Since leaving home, he has made an effort to reach out to me to let me know that he misses me. My course of action, to remove him from my life by not keeping in communication, is a passive unwillingness to keep him happy. This example can also be applied to the rule of maintaining equity, our lines of communication faltering due to my reluctance to give as much as I get. For every message I ignore, the relationship becomes more and more mutually unsatisfying; agitated that he continues to get across to me when I don’t show interest back, him seemingly feeling unsatisfied that I won’t provide whatever it that he desires from me. Both maintaining equity and making your friends happy are factors that can be used positively or negatively, consciously or unconsciously, affecting interpersonal relationships. Being aware of how vital showing support, seeking support, respecting privacy, keeping confidence, defending your friends, avoiding public criticism, making your friends happy, managing jealousy, sharing humor, and maintaining equity betters the quality of your friendships. They serve to define your interactions, giving you tools for optimal relationships if applied
I don’t value the relationship; therefore, I actively choose to not make him happy by reciprocating the contact. Since leaving home, he has made an effort to reach out to me to let me know that he misses me. My course of action, to remove him from my life by not keeping in communication, is a passive unwillingness to keep him happy. This example can also be applied to the rule of maintaining equity, our lines of communication faltering due to my reluctance to give as much as I get. For every message I ignore, the relationship becomes more and more mutually unsatisfying; agitated that he continues to get across to me when I don’t show interest back, him seemingly feeling unsatisfied that I won’t provide whatever it that he desires from me. Both maintaining equity and making your friends happy are factors that can be used positively or negatively, consciously or unconsciously, affecting interpersonal relationships. Being aware of how vital showing support, seeking support, respecting privacy, keeping confidence, defending your friends, avoiding public criticism, making your friends happy, managing jealousy, sharing humor, and maintaining equity betters the quality of your friendships. They serve to define your interactions, giving you tools for optimal relationships if applied