Mr. Wilbur Life

There once lived a prosaic man named Wilbur; he was a very dull and plain man. Although it seems like an exaggeration, it would not be a hyperbole to state that Wilbur could possibly be the most boring man on earth. Allow me to elucidate and go further into detail, Wilbur's life consists of the same routine everyday; Wilbur sits at home and reads the newspaper, followed by lunch, and then the afternoon news. The only semi-interesting thing about Wilbur is that he likes his subs cut into thirds instead of halves. One might begin to wonder why I have superfluous and abundant amounts of knowledge regarding Mr. Wilbur; I serve as an at home caretaker for the elderly. Mr. Wilbur is a seventy five year old male that is a hindrance and a burden to …show more content…
Wilbur was watching the seven o’clock news, when all of a sudden a portent flashes across the screen about a serial killer on the loose in the area. He glanced at me and said “ I would like to tell you the story of how I met my winsome wife; she was one of the sweetest people in town”. Mr. Wilbur was acted like a complete antithesis to himself; normally, he will not have a conversation with me. At first I thought that I was part of chimerical dream; but I quickly realized that the situation was real. I nodded my head in an overwrought fashion due to all of the excitement, and then Mr. Wilbur began his story. “One day, I was sitting at home, when another one of those warning messages appeared on the television. Keep in mind, this was when I lived a tractable lifestyle and was able to take care of myself. I was sitting in a chair and all of a sudden I heard a vociferous sound that could have ruptured an eardrum. A tall beautiful woman enervated my locks an and busted down my door. This woman possessed a stolid expression; it was very difficult to tell whether she wanted me dead or if it was love at first sight. This was an ephemeral moment; she quickly walked over to me and said ‘So I hear you're looking for a woman to spend the rest of your life with’. She had a beatific look in her eyes; she looked almost as if she had found her happy place. So what does a man do that has found his dream wife? He runs off to the nearest courthouse and marries …show more content…
I didn’t mean to forestall Mr. Wilbur’s story, however, I needed a moment to regather myself. I asked Mr. Wilbur whatever happened to his wife. “Well, I married her and she moved in. Sadly, she was arrested in the middle of the night two days after we got married. She was wanted as an accomplice to the murder of her boyfriend. The good news is, she gets out in two weeks and you’ll get a chance to meet her.”
I stood in complete disbelief, I was almost certain that he was telling me a fallacy. Before I could even ask, he pulled out her mugshot and a picture from the courthouse. I would have never thought that a quiet old man like Mr. Wilbur would ever be involved in anything that didn’t involve the color beige or taking a nap. Oh well, I guess it’s the quiet ones that you need to worry