Lilly's Philosocial Theory

Due to the vast diversity in the lifestyles, middle adulthood is ill-defined and frequently varies from person to person (Belsky, 2013). In order to understand the various life developments experienced during this life stage, I interviewed fifty-one-year-old Lilly. Lilly is a former cosmetologist and mother of three currently living in Murfreesboro. After the birth of her second child, Lilly left the workforce to become a stay at home mother. However, Lilly recently began a part-time job as a guest coordinator at a local salon. She expressed being nervous about reentering the workforce after being unemployed for nearly two decades. Lilly deeply loves and is proud of her three children and her husband, with whom she shares a twenty-three-year …show more content…
For example, Lilly credited her nearly 24-year marriage to love and commitment; however, she also explained that she and her husband have a weekly date night and occasionally do things without their children. According to Robert Sternberg’s triangular theory of love, Lilly and her husband fall under the consummate love category, or the “ideal form of love, in which a couple’s relationship involves…passion, intimacy, and commitment” (Belsky, 2013). Lilly depicted her marriage as being full of love and commitment, but she also described trying to remain passionate through weekly date nights and various trips and activities as a couple. Additionally, Lilly reported giving one another space and not taking hurtful comments personally when argument arise. According to research studies, couples are able to remain happy if they do not get personal during arguments and are sensitive to their spouses’ need for space (Belsky, 2013). Lilly and her husband’s style of resolving conflict is a key factor of the happiness of their marriage. On the other hand, Lilly reported feeling relief in addition to hurt and betrayal after her divorce. Feeling relief is a common feeling after the resolution of an unhappy marriage (Belsky, 2013). Although Lilly did not notice any other marital problems before the divorce, her husband’s affair caused their marriage to end negatively, which likely resulted her feelings of

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