Mask Identity

The amazing thing about masks is that they can hide a person’s identity to the world. They exist in two similar but different forms: the physical and the metaphorical. The physical mask can visibly hide a person’s identity but is easily removed to reveal the identity of the person underneath. The metaphorical mask like the physical can hide a person’s identity but unlike the physical mask it’s invisible to all but the wearer, can’t be easily removed, hides who a person truly is inside, and can cause untold amounts of suffering. While I have fond memories of wearing physical masks, such as trick-or-treating with my family every year on Halloween, those masks were easily removed at the end of the night. My single metaphorical mask however, wasn’t …show more content…
With the mask I was able to hide my differences and blend in as a “boy”. I did and tried many stereotypical boy activities, everything from trying to play sports, rough housing with my younger brothers, and everything in between. It wasn't until I got older that I realized that my metaphorical mask started to grow tighter and started to asphyxiate me psychologically but I did remove the mask for fear of being ostracized by others. The mask grew its tightest when I entered my sophomore year of high school. By then not even the school clubs and extracurricular activities that I’ve come to enjoy participating in took my mind off my suffering. The only true way that I was able to express myself without removing my mask was through writing poetry and short stories, which were significantly dark, sick, disturbing, and ultimately very depressing. I continued to participate in my usual activities, but from the day I took up writing to ease my suffering I carried around a journal that I wrote down all of the work that came from my suffering …show more content…
We would have conversations about how the other was doing, what was on our minds, etc. One day when I was just casually scrolling through my dashboard on Tumblr I received a fan mail message I opened it to no surprise to see that it was from her but what surprised me was what was written in this message. She asked me if she could tell me something. I replied telling her that she could tell me anything. It was then that she told me that she wasn’t really a girl but was actually a boy inside and also asked me not to tell anyone. I promised not to and I kept that promise. He started to break his own mask and become the boy named Sav Rode that I am glad to know and have as a friend today, but what he did not realize was that by telling me that secret he unknowingly gave me the courage to explore my identity and find out who I truly was inside. At first I started to identify as bigender and started to live my life as both a male named Zakkery William Vance and as a female named Alison Jewel Vance. It was only after a while that I realized that I was never really a male in any capacity and that my metaphorical mask was only half-broken. When I realized this I tore that last half off, tossed it out, and with it the person I had pretended to be all my life. I was and will never be Zakkery William Vance. I am proud to say that I am and always will be Alison Jewel Vance. In retrospect, I kept my