Thank you for letting me to be your peer to review your Final Essay, I will try my best to point out and making suggestion as far as my knowledge serves me. I will look over paragraph by paragraph, from page one to the last page of your essay.
You have not put title for the essay and I have some difficulty to grasp the main idea. I find it very helpful if we start to state the title and start writing, although later on we may change the title or adjust it as the story develops.
In MLA format, the title of the novel supposedly written with quotation mark instead of italicized, as corrected by professor Cunningham on Tuesday. And there are some typographic errors, especially using space between words (please refer to the Works Cited, the names …show more content…
And the paragraph one seems consists several main ideas that can be divided into a couple independent paragraphs. For example, in paragraph one you are addressing Maria’s situation and BZ’s, they are not corresponding in the context within paragraph one. Beside, you are also addressing several topics in Maria’s situation that can be clearly expanded: like the pressure of Hollywood persona upon Maria’s mental condition; Her relationship with the people surround her, Kate, BZ and the others; and Maria’s …show more content…
All the metaphors mentioned in this paragraph seem disconnected, because they are written individually structured. There are dichotomy examples, how we interpret the names of Carter and Maria, and Didion’s writing style as three unrelated ideas in one paragraph. And Didion’s writing style explanation continued to next paragraph creates gap.
Paragraph six page six. Repetitive arguments of Didion’s writing techniques and ideas brought up in the earlier paragraph, i.e. Maria and her out of control state which has been mentioned in other paragraphs.
Paragraph seven page seven brings no clear conclusion, or closing argument of the essay.
Finally, I would like to suggest you to give closer attention on syntaxes and punctuations. And you missed that this Final Essay requires at least three scholarly sources not including the novel, as briefed.
This essay is rich with ideas and interesting turns, you just need to employ the ideas into solid paragraphs. “Play It As It Lays” is not a conventional novel, the plot jumps back and fort but you managed to sort it out into this essay. Eventually, your conception of the story will be
You have not put title for the essay and I have some difficulty to grasp the main idea. I find it very helpful if we start to state the title and start writing, although later on we may change the title or adjust it as the story develops.
In MLA format, the title of the novel supposedly written with quotation mark instead of italicized, as corrected by professor Cunningham on Tuesday. And there are some typographic errors, especially using space between words (please refer to the Works Cited, the names …show more content…
And the paragraph one seems consists several main ideas that can be divided into a couple independent paragraphs. For example, in paragraph one you are addressing Maria’s situation and BZ’s, they are not corresponding in the context within paragraph one. Beside, you are also addressing several topics in Maria’s situation that can be clearly expanded: like the pressure of Hollywood persona upon Maria’s mental condition; Her relationship with the people surround her, Kate, BZ and the others; and Maria’s …show more content…
All the metaphors mentioned in this paragraph seem disconnected, because they are written individually structured. There are dichotomy examples, how we interpret the names of Carter and Maria, and Didion’s writing style as three unrelated ideas in one paragraph. And Didion’s writing style explanation continued to next paragraph creates gap.
Paragraph six page six. Repetitive arguments of Didion’s writing techniques and ideas brought up in the earlier paragraph, i.e. Maria and her out of control state which has been mentioned in other paragraphs.
Paragraph seven page seven brings no clear conclusion, or closing argument of the essay.
Finally, I would like to suggest you to give closer attention on syntaxes and punctuations. And you missed that this Final Essay requires at least three scholarly sources not including the novel, as briefed.
This essay is rich with ideas and interesting turns, you just need to employ the ideas into solid paragraphs. “Play It As It Lays” is not a conventional novel, the plot jumps back and fort but you managed to sort it out into this essay. Eventually, your conception of the story will be