Reflective Essay: Who Am I M Gay?

810 Words 4 Pages
As a young girl, I didn’t fully understand what “gay” meant. My sister once tricked me into saying that I was gay and I ended up yelling “I’m gay!” throughout our house, blissfully unaware of what I was saying. My sister isn’t a homophobe, though. She came out as bisexual when she was around thirteen years old, and I remember her telling me she was dating a girl a few years after that. If I’m being honest, I thought it was kind of cool, but I never thought I would ever be into girls. I had a new crush on a boy almost every year, how could I like girls?

I had always had a feeling that I was not simply straight. I remem I realized I was bisexual in 2016 after taking the Kinsey Scale Test for what felt like the 100th time and receiving a ‘3’
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I went with my sister and her boyfriend, and I only remember a few things. First of all, I didn’t quite know what drag queens were, so when I saw a very glamorous woman lip syncing a song from a popular musical, I totally thought she was singing, and totally didn’t know that she was in fact a man in a wig. There was a segment in which gay and lesbian couples were invited up onto the main stage to answer questions about their relationships, and I also remember my sister entered a raffle to receive an adult sex toy, which I thought was kind of weird. By far the best part of the day was when we were visited by an older woman giving away necklaces that she had made. They all had clay, cross pendants with small three-dimensional rainbows on them (mine was a shimmery purple.) Then, when I flipped the pendant to its other side, I noticed something. On the back in permanent marker, the woman had written, “God Loves You.” It touched my heart, knowing that a presumably Christian woman made it her duty to tell those in the LGBT community that they’re loved. Her kind gesture has always stuck with me. I still have that necklace, and I plan on wearing to Milwaukee Pride this …show more content…
It’s sadly been rare for me to find a self-identified straight guy who was comfortable in his sexuality, masculinity, and didn’t mock other guys for their sexual and gender expression. I’ve also found it sad that I feel like I can’t be honest about my sexuality with most people I meet, or even my older family members. I don’t fear total rejection, but I worry that people will act weird about it. That makes me feel restricted and I shouldn’t have to feel that

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