John Scazzero

Matthew 5:3 (AMP) reminds me that I am most “spiritually prosperous” when I am broken and “poor in spirit”. Dr. John Coe’s lecture series opened my eyes to my fallenness and God used his words to reveal my belief in moralism; my own moral failure. Embracing my brokenness became a joy for me once I understood that nothing I could ever do would accomplish what needed done in my heart and life. Surrendering my soul, my will and my fleshly desires, I was broken and my flesh crucified; now I am resurrected in Christ. After attempting for so many years to be good enough, do enough, try hard enough and meet expectations of others as a PK, MK and later as a pastor’s wife, I was worn out and tired of failing. Trying to be “good” was ironically accomplishing the opposite. Admitting I am a failure and embracing my fallenness, my flesh, and being broken is a blessing, Now I am praying in new ways like listening prayer, recollection prayer and meditation over Psalm …show more content…
According to Scazzero’s spiritual survey, in the matters of understanding my limits and dealing with grieving and loss, I scored closer to an emotional child, however, during this class God has been working on me. Consequentially, in what I call a “God-thing”, I unknowingly began this class early; this meant I was reading and working on content about two weeks earlier than most of the class. A week or so before my grandpa died, I was reading Scazzero’s chapter on grieving; praying and seeking God’s truth about how to apply it to my life. On the following Monday, I received a call that my grandpa was not doing well, by Tuesday, March 22nd, God called him home. Embracing grief after losing Grandpa and allowing God full access to my deep was the most freeing thing I have ever experienced. I wept, prayed, was comforted, trusted and received grace; God was present in it