Theme Of Resonance In Andrew Solomon's Son

Superior Essays
The average person would not want to have a child with a horizontal identity. After all, why would you want to have a child who would have to face so many struggles in their life? Andrew Solomon struggled with a horizontal identity himself. In Son, by Andrew Solomon, horizontal identities as opposed to vertical identities aren’t liked by the family as they deviate from the norm and because of this, he struggled to gain acceptance from even his own mother due to his homosexuality. Fredrickson’s ideas of positivity resonance have the power to unite people through positive emotions and communication. In Selections from Love 2.0, by Barbara Fredrickson, positivity resonance is moment in which a positive emotion courses through two people’s brains …show more content…
During positivity resonance, you would focus on the “we” instead of the “me” since your brain expands to include others and become more selfless. Fredrickson explains this change in focus by stating “Under the influence of positive emotions, your sense of self actually expands to include others to greater degrees. Your best friend, in these lighthearted moments, simply seems like a bigger part of you” (Fredrickson 113). Fredrickson describes these moments as being “lighthearted” as they aren’t very serious but at the same time are crucial to having empathy and understanding of one another. The words “a bigger part of you” emphasizes the inclusiveness caused by positive emotional connection. When someone is a bigger part of you, they are included in your feelings and emotions. Solomon and his mother lacked this connection. Andrew Solomon’s mothers lack of positivity resonance was apparent through the selfishness of her actions and thoughts. Solomon states “My mother didn’t want me to be gay because she thought it wouldn’t be the happiest course for me, but equally, she didn’t like the image of herself as the mother of a gay son” (Fredrickson 376). Andrew Solomon’s disapproval of the way his mother handled his horizontal identity is clearly shown here. Solomon’s mother was attending to her own needs in a negative way by trying …show more content…
Positivity resonance causes a positive “vibe” between people. Before positivity resonance, parents can’t truly understand the emotions of their child since their brain still hasn’t shifted from the focus on “me” to “we”. They’re still thinking about how others will perceive them, being the parent of a child with an identity considered abnormal instead of focusing on their relationship. After positivity resonance is reached, the parent can connect with the child’s emotions in a positive way, making it easier to accept them for who they are. They would then have no reason or longing to change their child. The power of positive emotions during positivity resonance can change parents negative view of their child into a more positive and caring view. They accept their children sooner. When children feel accepted by their parents, they feel as if they are included and normal. They no longer feel as if they are a liability. On the other hand, mutual connection with negative emotions further separates people in any relationship. Instead of making a person feel as if they are a bigger part of his or herself, it does the exact opposite. It only separates people. This seems to have been what occurred in Solomon’s childhood with his mother. They connected on a very negative level in which they both felt vulnerable. For this reason,

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