Imagery In The Blade Runner

537 Words 3 Pages
Grant, I hadn't seen the word triptych before and wish I had looked it up before reading the story rather than after, it is an apt title. I enjoyed the story. You have some fantastic imagery throughout the piece. The image of his friend painted black and “being photographed by an older woman with buzzed hair wearing boots and suspenders,” I felt captured her essence and did an excellent job setting the tone for how she interacts with the world and the boys. The image you used of her death is fantastic as well. Suspended between the canoe (life raft?) and the lake floor, stuck in between two worlds, like the narrator’s life between work and art. One thing to consider (pertaining to her death) is the first mention of the lake isn't until page eight. It's right outside the …show more content…
It becomes a repeated and central point to the story, and it may serve you well to ensure the reader understands the nature of the reference (“idiotskin, in particular) for the readers that haven't seen Blade Runner. One place you may consider expanding is near the end of the story where you wrote, “My faculties are often inept. I look to the outside world unsympathetic maybe to most causes and situations.” This might be good place show the narrator's unsympathetic thoughts and inept faculties. It would be a good place to really cement the narrator's frame of mind. Finally, you may want to consider the grandparents role in the story. I felt like they were a looming presence, especially when, “Friend took heaps of meat that night and beat them against the speaker while she screamed.” I couldn’t help, but think of them in bed listening to sounds emanating from the basement. And since the grandfather delivers the news of her death, punching up their role in the story could create a greater sense of conflict in the discovery of her death. Thanks for letting us read your story and I look forward reading more of your

Related Documents