I thought I had a perfect relationship after thirteen years together with Crystal not married, but yet happy didn’t think my relationship needed any work because we have seen many other people’s relationship fall apart. One of the most accurate ways to predict whether a marriage will last is to consider how negative a couple’s communication is while they are dating. (Alder, p. 240) Of course, some negative communication is to be expected. The important thing is to balance it with positive communication people in satisfying relationships is to maintain at least a 5:1 ratio of positive to negative statements. (Alder, p. 240) A lot of relationships I seen fail was due to disconfirming messages, along with non-verbal communication because non-verbal
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The third communication behavior that Gibb identified as creating a poor communication climate is strategy. A more accurate term to describe this type of behavior is manipulation. (Alder, p. 244) many couples manipulate one and another to get what they want, but by doing so couples don’t realize the harm they are doing to their relationship. In every relationship nobody likes to feel like a guinea pig or even treated like a puppet. This is one that causes a lot of disagreements or even arguments in my own personal relationship. For an example, if I were to get up and go get a cold drink from the kitchen and return to the living room and sit down Crystal will say something like man my mouth is really dry, implementing she actually really thirsty and wants me to get her something to drink. So I get frustrated and defensive towards her because she just couldn’t directly ask for a drink while I was already up and in the kitchen getting my self-something, no she waits till I sit and get relaxed then boom manipulation starts till I eventually get up and get her a cold drink to stop an argument before it escalates even more. A straightforward message may not always get what you want, but in the long run it’s likely to pay dividends in a positive relational climate. (Alder, p.
The third communication behavior that Gibb identified as creating a poor communication climate is strategy. A more accurate term to describe this type of behavior is manipulation. (Alder, p. 244) many couples manipulate one and another to get what they want, but by doing so couples don’t realize the harm they are doing to their relationship. In every relationship nobody likes to feel like a guinea pig or even treated like a puppet. This is one that causes a lot of disagreements or even arguments in my own personal relationship. For an example, if I were to get up and go get a cold drink from the kitchen and return to the living room and sit down Crystal will say something like man my mouth is really dry, implementing she actually really thirsty and wants me to get her something to drink. So I get frustrated and defensive towards her because she just couldn’t directly ask for a drink while I was already up and in the kitchen getting my self-something, no she waits till I sit and get relaxed then boom manipulation starts till I eventually get up and get her a cold drink to stop an argument before it escalates even more. A straightforward message may not always get what you want, but in the long run it’s likely to pay dividends in a positive relational climate. (Alder, p.