How To Die: A Fictional Narrative

Laying there, entangled in his embrace, I gazed up at him as he was sleeping. He looked so peaceful. A part of me never wanted to leave, but a part of me knew that I had to. “Erik,” I whispered, hoping that he wouldn’t stir, but his eyes fluttered, and he smiled when he saw me. “You’re still here,” he whispered back, “This was the first time I hadn’t dreamt of you.” “That’s a good thing?” Erik pulled me closer, “I couldn’t touch you in my dreams.” He kissed me, and I felt light headed. But I couldn’t stay here forever, I knew that. And I knew Erik didn’t. “Erik,” I said, barely louder than a whisper, “I can’t stay for much longer.” “What do you mean?” Erik responded, and his face fell when he saw mine. “No,” he blurted, “No you can’t …show more content…
I just want Ann.” Erik had reached a breaking point from all the stress he had within him, to the point where all his agony and all his regret had conflated into a whole new level of depression. He was trapped in his own head, drowning in his thoughts. I gaped in horror as he lay shriveled in a heap in front of me, and realized with a jolt I did this to him. It was my fault he is broken and tormented. Because of me he is like this way. My legs felt like twigs, so I dropped to my knees. “What can I do?” I breathed. “Get out of my head!” Erik replied, his voice shrill and watery. I don’t know how to get out of his head though! The only way for him to stop thinking about me is if he resolves his conflict or if he never knew me at all. My head perked up. “I see now that I am nothing but a tormenter to you,” I murmured, “Perhaps it would be best if you never knew me at all?” Erik looked up at me, sniveling and grotesque, but he did not say a word in protest. I slowly came forward and slipped my hands into his. He was too weak to fight me off this …show more content…
I could see the chaos stirring in his head like a hurricane, and my voice caught in my throat as I said, “I love you Erik, with all my heart.” I kissed his forehead, and I could feel my memories of him slip away. I watched as Erik drifted off into a peaceful sleep, and I waited until he had completely dozed off before slipping away and backing up. “I will miss you Erik,” I whispered, and a second later I was back in my hotel room. Removing myself from Erik’s memories was the right thing to do, not only for Erik but for me. Now there is nothing in my way of fully resolving myself of Erik’s memory. By erasing his mind, I am leaving behind my past and forging a new future for myself. I ran my hand over my pocket, feeling my rock, and took it out and stared at it. Encased in this rock is my entire past. It had been my lifeline for many hard times in my life, but I have no need for it anymore. With my eyes still glued to my rock, I walked over to the doors that lead to the balcony and stepped out into the mild winter breeze. My thumb ran over my rock for the last time, and then I chucked it over the balcony and into the lake at the