hardest decision I ever made Essay

751 Words 4 Pages
In the spring of 2001, I had my first and only panic attack. I don’t remember a lot of details other than uncontrollable crying (the really ugly kind) and gasping for every breath as if it were my last. I was 24 at the time – barely out of college – and I’d already survived a lot of early 20’s angst, so what triggered the attack was pretty tame by comparison: I thought my boyfriend was on a short list for a promotion, resulting in an imminent move to Charlotte, North Carolina.That’s it.Not usually the stuff that results in convulsions on the floor. Still, it wasn’t the idea of him leaving that caused my whole body to revolt - it was the idea of going with him. That’s because moving to Charlotte meant I wouldn’t be moving to New York City …show more content…
and then I began to sob.When I looked up at where the towers once stood, I found myself surrounded by a group of tourists who were taking photos and chatting to each other in languages I didn’t understand. They were talking loudly – competing with the sound of what was now a full-on construction site – but when they saw me, everything stopped. Even the jackhammers and ever-present honking traffic somehow felt quiet as we all fixed on each other for a moment.Embarrassed by my raw display of emotion, I quickly looked away only to glance back a few seconds later. Perhaps to save me from even more embarrassment, many of the tourists had turned back to the site, but I locked eyes with a few of them and, even though we never said a word, I knew what they were thinking: Somehow, it was going to be alright.Today is my 10th wedding anniversary.That boyfriend from long ago is now my husband and the father of our two children. We didn’t go to Charlotte – ironically, we live in a city about 15 times smaller – but between that initial panic attack and right now, I’ve managed to build a very stable bridge between the city and the family I love. I have a business that allows me to visit New York often, yet I’m able to come home to the people who mean the most to me. I didn’t have to “choose” because, turns out, fulfillment isn’t the result of where you live,

Related Documents