A 43-year-old woman pretends to be 30 years old and marries a younger man who doesn’t know her true age.
FEEDBACK ON THE FIRST 79 PAGES
SALAD DAYS is a love story that follows the love life of Suzy a 43 year old woman, who lies to a 23 year old advertising executive, Valentino, telling him she’s 30. They eventually fall in love and marry, but she never tells him the truth. The truth comes out 20 years later, when their marriage is falling apart and after Valentino has cheated on Suzy, jeopardizing their happiness.
The script explores the theme of timeless love and gender age differences. It’s not a new topic to the film industry, but always one that is intriguing to explore. However, the script would benefit from continued developed.
One of the main …show more content…
Also, there’s no need for her to even say this, as it sounds contrived.
There’s repetitive dialogue about Valentino dating “big girls.” On page 38, it shouldn’t be Valentino talking – it should be Bob.
The idea of the skinheads and them being chased doesn’t work with Stan. It doesn’t fit with the storyline and it’s doesn’t add strong humor. The idea that they went to a motel and it becomes a misunderstanding is appreciated, but just not how executed.
The first scene with Richard needs to be revised. The scene should open with Suzy and Diane talking (feels awkward not to hear them) and the opening should establish the comedy genre. When Suzy attacks Richard, one would expect more of a visual reaction from Richard and that he would say something (comedic).
In addition, the opening with Richard doesn’t really have anything to do with the plot. It might be different if Richard dumped Suzy because he wanted someone younger (even in her 20’s or maybe open when she’s in her 40’s), as this would connect to the plot and her internal fear of aging and being rejected. One can understand why she would then lie about her age on the
FEEDBACK ON THE FIRST 79 PAGES
SALAD DAYS is a love story that follows the love life of Suzy a 43 year old woman, who lies to a 23 year old advertising executive, Valentino, telling him she’s 30. They eventually fall in love and marry, but she never tells him the truth. The truth comes out 20 years later, when their marriage is falling apart and after Valentino has cheated on Suzy, jeopardizing their happiness.
The script explores the theme of timeless love and gender age differences. It’s not a new topic to the film industry, but always one that is intriguing to explore. However, the script would benefit from continued developed.
One of the main …show more content…
Also, there’s no need for her to even say this, as it sounds contrived.
There’s repetitive dialogue about Valentino dating “big girls.” On page 38, it shouldn’t be Valentino talking – it should be Bob.
The idea of the skinheads and them being chased doesn’t work with Stan. It doesn’t fit with the storyline and it’s doesn’t add strong humor. The idea that they went to a motel and it becomes a misunderstanding is appreciated, but just not how executed.
The first scene with Richard needs to be revised. The scene should open with Suzy and Diane talking (feels awkward not to hear them) and the opening should establish the comedy genre. When Suzy attacks Richard, one would expect more of a visual reaction from Richard and that he would say something (comedic).
In addition, the opening with Richard doesn’t really have anything to do with the plot. It might be different if Richard dumped Suzy because he wanted someone younger (even in her 20’s or maybe open when she’s in her 40’s), as this would connect to the plot and her internal fear of aging and being rejected. One can understand why she would then lie about her age on the