Finding Myself Essay

1026 Words Dec 15th, 2015 5 Pages
Finding Myself

People think it’s so easy to change. They think it’s so easy, but it isn’t. Sure, things don’t always stay the same. You get a new couch, boys come and go, you gain a new scar, discover a new song, or you find a new passion. But in the end you’re still just you. Always spinning and turning in awkward beautiful shapes like a ballerina on a floor, spinning and spinning only to come back to the same position.

A conflict I’ve always had to face a lot in my life is myself. I’ve always had a problem with accepting myself for who I am, what I’ve done, and what I can become. Self-esteem was my greatest issue. From the time I was in fourth grade I didn’t fit in. I probably didn’t fit in before that either but I noticed myself
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I learned that the things we hate about ourselves aren’t more real than the things we like about ourselves. So in other words, I wasn’t going to fix my own conflict if I didn’t stop letting people’s warped words get into my head.

I started looking at myself in the mirror and saying things like, “Today, you look great.”, “You’re the prettiest princess in all of the land.”, “ You’re smarter than you think.”, and my personal favorite, “I know this, I can do this, I can figure this out!” I practically live by that motto now to help me get though things.

I’m not in the dark anymore. It took a long time but that’s okay. I’m still finding out who I am but I know I’m not who I was. Of course I still have a long way to go, but I’m already so far from where I used to be and I’m very proud that I never gave up hope in my darkest hours.
I believe that I have changed a lot since then. I’ve grown into beautiful shades of different colors to make a big collage of what will look like ‘success’ if you look farther down the road. I now think of other obstacles as a new shade to add and I think that’s what really makes the difference; a different view.

I remember I used to always be so timid around everyone. I was scared to go out into public, scared to talk to new people, and scared of going out and seeing one of my old bullies. I finally had enough and decided that it was my life; I was going to take it back. So, I did any other reasonable thing my mind could

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