I think my thesis overall is effective because I'm describing what is going to be in the paper without actually saying, "In this paper". The thesis is down to the point, simple and clean. Even though I did say I was going to show you some beneficial ways Greek life has done for themselves and the communities I was being to broad in this statement. In order to fix this I'm going to have to somehow fit my points that I made into the paper into my thesis. I could even include that I'm an affiliated member in a sorority at this campus.
