When I began my healing journey approximately five years ago, I learned I had been "programmed" to believe I deserved to be mistreated by others, so I failed to recognize their behaviors as abusive, but now that I know it has never been my fault, I have no tolerance whatsoever for that behavior in my life. Then, about a year ago, a stumbled onto some information on Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) and narcissistic abuse, and the pieces really started falling into place! Since then, I have been systematically cutting toxic and abusive people off as I discover them, and it feels like there will be next to no one left when I'm finished. There have been times I have second guessed myself and wondered if I'm overreacting. However, I know that is a result of a lifetime of gaslighting, so whenever I feel like that, I ask myself these questions: Why am I cutting this person off? Do they consistently make me feel badly about myself? Do they continue to do things they know are hurtful to me? Do they engage in abusive behavior?
If it is because they do any of the following, I know I'm not "overreacting" or being unreasonable. Whether they understand what they are doing or not, they are detrimental to my mental health and well-being; therefore, I must protect myself from them and their actions. People who engage in any of the following abusive behaviors or tactics are no longer permitted in my life, no matter who they are or what our relationship has