Dr. Coontz discusses the multiple misconceptions we have about marriage and relationships within our society. A lot of times, we feel like the majority of things in our society like single parenthood, and divorce are new concepts in our generation, and free choice of marital partner and separate spheres for men and women are old concepts, when in fact this isn’t all true. Changes have occurred throughout the past couple of decades where marriage is now for love and there are more freedoms in relationships. These changes in family dynamics have become consequential and although some are positive, some have also brought hardship and pain. Contrary to our beliefs, single parent families and step families were actually the norm throughout history.
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In Japan, men would have to write a little haiku to have a divorce and women would have to do two years of service at a temple. Marriage was not as public and legal as it is today. Marriage license didn’t exist till 1754 and the process of a divorce wasn’t as complex and difficult.
When it comes to free choice of marital power, there has been a lot of changes from the past to today. In the past, the parents would normally set up an arranged marriage. The marriage arrangement was more for the family of the lady to join her daughter in marriage with a male of an equal or higher class to obtain power. The parents of the son would arrange his marriage with a lady whose parents would offer the most dowry. Marriage was centered on intrigue and making alliances. Because of these arranged marriages not involving love at all, sex outside of a marriage was common in the past. Prostitution and cheating were normal and, unlike today, it wasn’t considered as big of a deal due to the fact that emotions were not the center of the marriage back then so the relationship was more stable.
Not until very recently has the separate spheres for men and women slowly been disappearing. This concept of separate spheres though was surprisingly a new one. In the …show more content…
Changes since 1970 have showed a decrease in the stable marriages and the weakening of marriage as an institution. Although we now have options of whether we want to marry or not or leave marriages, this has taken rise to childless
couples along with rise in age of marriage and the separation of reproduction. Even though marriages now have the benefit of being more passionate and intimate than in the past, this leads to less bearable more fragile marriages. Like Dr. Coontz explains, the family structure now is irreversible but she believes that it will only lead us to a more positive family structure in the future. She suggests us not to go back to how things were in the past but to take the advantages that have come from the current changes, like women working alongside men and free choice of marital partner and just work on the disadvantages, like instability of marriage and the loss of it as an institution. We have to find a way to integrate love along with control and stability which
In Japan, men would have to write a little haiku to have a divorce and women would have to do two years of service at a temple. Marriage was not as public and legal as it is today. Marriage license didn’t exist till 1754 and the process of a divorce wasn’t as complex and difficult.
When it comes to free choice of marital power, there has been a lot of changes from the past to today. In the past, the parents would normally set up an arranged marriage. The marriage arrangement was more for the family of the lady to join her daughter in marriage with a male of an equal or higher class to obtain power. The parents of the son would arrange his marriage with a lady whose parents would offer the most dowry. Marriage was centered on intrigue and making alliances. Because of these arranged marriages not involving love at all, sex outside of a marriage was common in the past. Prostitution and cheating were normal and, unlike today, it wasn’t considered as big of a deal due to the fact that emotions were not the center of the marriage back then so the relationship was more stable.
Not until very recently has the separate spheres for men and women slowly been disappearing. This concept of separate spheres though was surprisingly a new one. In the …show more content…
Changes since 1970 have showed a decrease in the stable marriages and the weakening of marriage as an institution. Although we now have options of whether we want to marry or not or leave marriages, this has taken rise to childless
couples along with rise in age of marriage and the separation of reproduction. Even though marriages now have the benefit of being more passionate and intimate than in the past, this leads to less bearable more fragile marriages. Like Dr. Coontz explains, the family structure now is irreversible but she believes that it will only lead us to a more positive family structure in the future. She suggests us not to go back to how things were in the past but to take the advantages that have come from the current changes, like women working alongside men and free choice of marital partner and just work on the disadvantages, like instability of marriage and the loss of it as an institution. We have to find a way to integrate love along with control and stability which