Meaning Of Me: My Personal Identity

Superior Essays
Meaning of Me
What is life like as a person of color, living in a white suburban area? My white name did not fit my face of color, ultimately conflicting my identity. Personally, I had to have two names in order to get by in society. Throughout my life, I have been called numerous stereotypical names, except my own name, “Rebecca.” To be frank, they have not been the best nicknames in the world. Yet I still am striving to hold both my American and Korean names and identities close.
My first name is Rebecca; but also to some people, “Ling Ling,” “Ching Chang Chong,” “Fortune Cookie,” “Chinese Germs,” “Mulan,” “Chink,” “Asian Girl” and many more. I’ve come to a realization that non-Asian races are ignorant of the different cultures and races
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My mother made my name for me by using a Chinese character dictionary. Just like how there are Latin roots in the English language, the Chinese characters are a foundation for the Korean language and alphabet. I only get called “Ye In” by my family or my Korean friends. The relationship that I have with my Korean culture, is a bit of a long, tiresome marathon. As a kid, I always questioned myself if I should be “whiter” or be “more Korean.” The reason behind such thoughts were due to one event in elementary school in which I brought a Korean snack to lunch, and all the kids responded in an abhorrent manner. The kids’ eyes screamed with distaste and looked at me with condescending glares. Pursing their lips in disgust, they would whisper and snicker amongst themselves. Since that day, I never brought any Korean food to school. Even speaking my mother tongue left people flabbergasted. If I could just educate some Americans that there are other languages besides English. As for my last name “Pyun” or “편,” it means fidelity; never changing. When people try to pronounce my last name, they mispronounce it by saying “Peen, Pie-yoon, Poon, Pun.” There’s not a lot of Koreans with my last name and I have yet to find another

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