The Futility of Perfection
I groan internally as I finish practicing a passage for what seems like the thousandth time that morning. “Why on earth did I pick this instrument?” I wonder aloud. After all, clarinet playing is not easy by anyone’s standards. I had spent the past forty-five minutes attempting to perfect eight measures of an etude I needed to learn for the All-District Band audition in the coming month. With every attempt, it seemed that a new problem would arise; the frustration never ended. I became frantic, convinced that if I could not play these eight measures perfectly my career as a musician would somehow come to its ultimate demise.
I conceded that I could just be stressed; this audition music had been part of my daily practice …show more content…
Each time I scored lower than I expected myself to, I felt embarrassed and unworthy of any sort of praise. Although a desire to achieve perfection can motivate a person to work harder, its long-term effects put a strain on the soul. The reality that perfection simply cannot exist in the human condition made me realize how much I had missed out on, from meaningful relationships with my friends and family to the exhilaration of a performance in front of thousands of people. I had abandoned my own sense of happiness in search of a divine quality that is not available in this world. Now that I am free from the rigidity of perfection, I am able to creatively express my own personal musicality. Practicing has become less of a chore and more of an enjoyable experience; in my academic life, I have become less stressed and am able to actually enjoy what I learn. I feel happier overall, and enjoy more of the little things in life, because I learned there is not time to stress over a quality that does not dwell on this earth. It is a waste of time to falsely believe perfection holds all the answers to life; faultlessness itself is faulty, because it does not bring beauty and peace, but rather a stressful and worrisome existence.
Personal Statement
I have been under a guardianship with my grandparents for fifteen years; although I have never done without in terms of my home life or my education,
I groan internally as I finish practicing a passage for what seems like the thousandth time that morning. “Why on earth did I pick this instrument?” I wonder aloud. After all, clarinet playing is not easy by anyone’s standards. I had spent the past forty-five minutes attempting to perfect eight measures of an etude I needed to learn for the All-District Band audition in the coming month. With every attempt, it seemed that a new problem would arise; the frustration never ended. I became frantic, convinced that if I could not play these eight measures perfectly my career as a musician would somehow come to its ultimate demise.
I conceded that I could just be stressed; this audition music had been part of my daily practice …show more content…
Each time I scored lower than I expected myself to, I felt embarrassed and unworthy of any sort of praise. Although a desire to achieve perfection can motivate a person to work harder, its long-term effects put a strain on the soul. The reality that perfection simply cannot exist in the human condition made me realize how much I had missed out on, from meaningful relationships with my friends and family to the exhilaration of a performance in front of thousands of people. I had abandoned my own sense of happiness in search of a divine quality that is not available in this world. Now that I am free from the rigidity of perfection, I am able to creatively express my own personal musicality. Practicing has become less of a chore and more of an enjoyable experience; in my academic life, I have become less stressed and am able to actually enjoy what I learn. I feel happier overall, and enjoy more of the little things in life, because I learned there is not time to stress over a quality that does not dwell on this earth. It is a waste of time to falsely believe perfection holds all the answers to life; faultlessness itself is faulty, because it does not bring beauty and peace, but rather a stressful and worrisome existence.
Personal Statement
I have been under a guardianship with my grandparents for fifteen years; although I have never done without in terms of my home life or my education,