Essay on Book Review: Why Dont We Listen Better

1151 Words Feb 9th, 2013 5 Pages
book review: Why don’t we listen better

Presented to Dr. Mario Garcia

In partial fulfillment of the requirements of

Introduction to Pastoral Counseling

PACO 500

Liberty Baptist Theological Seminary
Lynchburg, VA
Feburary 3, 2013


My Summation: James Petersen’s book Why Don’t We Listen Better, is a true guide in making relationships better with better communication. This book does not just help people communicate better in a work environment such as ministry or a counseling setting, but in everyday interactions with people and relationships. Petersen discusses the Flat Brain Theory and Flat Brain Tango, which shows why people have problems/ issues concerning listening to each other.
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Personally, of course I gained much more insight and knowledge in the listening aspect of communication, but I was surprised just how much I learned when it comes to the talking aspect of communication. For example if someone came to me for some advice and I agreed to hear them out. Before reading the book I would cut into their story and try and solve the problem the way I would in my own context. With what I know now even if I had the solution to help them the way I was delivering that solution only had negative effects. Sometimes it is ok to cut in on the story to help give a possible solution, but you have to make sure to speak and then stop so the person can get back to the story and I can go back to listening.
My Investigation: I really enjoyed in chapter fourteen when it comes to understanding when as a counselor you are suppose to give advice. “If we say, ‘the only thing for you to do in this situation is…,’ that pushy, and won’t give the hearer much room to breathe. If we sound like we have the absolute word and know better than they do, they’ll most likely reject our suggestions.” I can remember every time before reading this book giving advice to others always starting by saying, “the only thing for you.” Now I have been taught through this book how I should suggest advice from the

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