Friends and family will die before I do
This is a universal concern, isn’t it?
And, this phenomenon has already started for me. I went through the early life losses of a friend in High School who died in an automobile crash. Also, my very best friend in the Marine Corps died in a helicopter crash when we were in our early 20s.
And then there were the middle life losses of my parents, grandparents, and so many Aunts and Uncles.
I can share that these earlier deaths were certainly difficult and caused long periods of grieving for me. But in those instances, I was surrounded by family and friends – all of us going through the stages of grief together and finding ways to support one another.
So, now I have passed through my 60’s, beginning …show more content…
Even though I was aware that he was not well, it came as a shock to get the call. Reality now sets in and I think about my remaining friends as being as fragile as I am and this reminds me of our certain mortality.
But, here’s the thing.
I know that it is impossible that all of my remaining family and friends will simply live as long as I do. Either I will die and leave them all to grieve or they will die and I will grieve. There is no third choice.
So, this is simply a reality of the aging experience. Although it is not a notion that I dwell upon, I do recognize that this is the deal. And, there is one bright opportunity.
This realization can cause us to soberly acknowledge a reality that our relationships are just for a time.
The choice is to either ruminate and feel badly about this reality, OR we can decide to enjoy every day and every moment of every encounter that remains with loved ones.
We can also decide to live so that we will die with no regrets. This is not easy to do, but I have decided to manage all of my relationships with a loving soul – speaking the truth to all, living authentically, and, above all, making room in my heart to ask for forgiveness where needed, and to offer forgiveness to …show more content…
This would seem to equate to an assumption that there is safety in numbers and that the individual is far less likely to be attacked or harmed when others are near.
I would grant to this is a real and natural feeling. It seems to explain the related need that some of these very same people must be in the company of other animals who provide companionship and, at a primal level, perhaps, safety (there is a mutual pact to protect each other should the need arise).
And then there are people like me. We are not in any way superior to the others. We are just plain different. I am describing people like myself for whom the desire has never arisen to be in the company of others (not even “pets”) to feel comfortable and well entertained. Yes, we are the folks who are just fine when others are around, but when left to our own devices, we are at ease and find ways to manage our time without a thought about “missing” the company of others, until others are present. In other words, we are just fine either way.
What I am describing for myself and others is a middle ground between those who are in constant need of the presence of others and those who prefer the life of a
This is a universal concern, isn’t it?
And, this phenomenon has already started for me. I went through the early life losses of a friend in High School who died in an automobile crash. Also, my very best friend in the Marine Corps died in a helicopter crash when we were in our early 20s.
And then there were the middle life losses of my parents, grandparents, and so many Aunts and Uncles.
I can share that these earlier deaths were certainly difficult and caused long periods of grieving for me. But in those instances, I was surrounded by family and friends – all of us going through the stages of grief together and finding ways to support one another.
So, now I have passed through my 60’s, beginning …show more content…
Even though I was aware that he was not well, it came as a shock to get the call. Reality now sets in and I think about my remaining friends as being as fragile as I am and this reminds me of our certain mortality.
But, here’s the thing.
I know that it is impossible that all of my remaining family and friends will simply live as long as I do. Either I will die and leave them all to grieve or they will die and I will grieve. There is no third choice.
So, this is simply a reality of the aging experience. Although it is not a notion that I dwell upon, I do recognize that this is the deal. And, there is one bright opportunity.
This realization can cause us to soberly acknowledge a reality that our relationships are just for a time.
The choice is to either ruminate and feel badly about this reality, OR we can decide to enjoy every day and every moment of every encounter that remains with loved ones.
We can also decide to live so that we will die with no regrets. This is not easy to do, but I have decided to manage all of my relationships with a loving soul – speaking the truth to all, living authentically, and, above all, making room in my heart to ask for forgiveness where needed, and to offer forgiveness to …show more content…
This would seem to equate to an assumption that there is safety in numbers and that the individual is far less likely to be attacked or harmed when others are near.
I would grant to this is a real and natural feeling. It seems to explain the related need that some of these very same people must be in the company of other animals who provide companionship and, at a primal level, perhaps, safety (there is a mutual pact to protect each other should the need arise).
And then there are people like me. We are not in any way superior to the others. We are just plain different. I am describing people like myself for whom the desire has never arisen to be in the company of others (not even “pets”) to feel comfortable and well entertained. Yes, we are the folks who are just fine when others are around, but when left to our own devices, we are at ease and find ways to manage our time without a thought about “missing” the company of others, until others are present. In other words, we are just fine either way.
What I am describing for myself and others is a middle ground between those who are in constant need of the presence of others and those who prefer the life of a