The guilt took over his actions and Amir convinced himself that the only way to be rid of the feelings was to make whatever was causing them to disappear. That meant Hassan had to go. No presents could make him feel joy. “I don’t know why I even bothered, since I just gave them a joyless glance and pitched them to the corner of the room” (101) Not even Baba’s gift of a new bike and the wrist watch brought him joy. The wristwatch did do something for him, but it was not for good. The guilt and pain was too much and it consumed Amir. The biggest lie that Amir told turned out to be the worst one he would ever tell. He felt so much pain when he told Baba that Hassan stole the wristwatch and money. Knowing that Baba did not tolerate lying, he thought that it would be the perfect plan to rid himself of all the pain he had. Baba had told him his whole life that sin was after all, the worst sin. Amir knew that it would hurt for some time, but he felt that having Hassan and his perfect self there would be an eternal torture. It hurt him to know that Hassan had been crying because of his actions and what has become of himself. His guilt was suffocating him so much so, that he could not even admit what he had done even after Hassan confessed. With a simple “yes,” Hassan broke Amir. He wanted to shout that he did it. “I wanted to tell them all that I was the snake in the grass, the monster in the lake. I …show more content…
He never felt like he truly got punishment for his actions on that day in the alley. That moment lived inside of him and was so deeply ingrained in his mind. Throughout his whole life, moving to America, getting married, being with his dad while he was sick and dying, the guilt was still there. He still was on a journey to find redemption, but at this point in his life, he did not know how, that was until he talked to Rahim Khan, a friend and business partner of his dad’s from Kabul. Amir’s conversation only made his pain worse, after finding out that Hassan was his brother, he could hardly bear the pain anymore. He needed an out. After all these years, the guilt was piling up right below the surface, it affected his whole life. It affected his marriage, he could not even tell his own wife about what he did. The relationship he had with his dad was strained, it was especially heartbreaking when he found out the lie that Baba had told his whole life. The most important aspect of life it affected was how Amir saw himself. He was a coward, and until he found that redemption, he would always be one. When Rahim said there was a way to do that, he knew he had to do whatever it took. (Quote) He went back to Kabul because he found out he had a nephew, and after finding out Hassan died, he knew that this was his chance. Caring for Sohrab was his way to find redemption. In Kabul, he found trouble getting Sohrab, and finally