Alain De Bottons Why You Will Carry The Wrong Person

Alain De Bottons wrote “Why you will marry the wrong person.” It is an intriguing title for an article because many people desire to get married and build a family. I chose this piece because “It’s one of the things we are most afraid might happen to us” (pg. 1). When reading the title it could come off as a bit pessimistic, but towards the end it took a turn. The author uses mainly pathos to persuade readers and the rest consists of logos. Unfortunately there was not much ethos utilized in the essay to support him hence making his argument lose power. He goes on to talk about the reasons that people get married in the modern day and argue how some of those reasons lead to picking the wrong person.
Alain uses pathos to help the audience relate …show more content…
Some can relate because who likes to admit they are the problem? He gave examples of why individuals would form unions in the past including: money, shared religion, advancements in station, or because they resided near each other. He believes marriages based on these factors would often result in abuse, infidelity and loneliness. The implications at which are a result of these types marriages trigger an emotional state of concern for the readers no one wants abuse , infidelity or to be lonely. As a result readers will avoid marrying for these reasons. His audience could consist of a wide range of western people: men, women, singles, or married couples. He changes gears and begins to talk about the modern reasons for marriage. “We have to be wholly at peace with the prospect of many years of solitude in order to be appropriately picky; otherwise, we risk loving no longer being single rather more than we love the partner that spared us that fate” (pg. 2). The author is trying to tell his audience that we fall in love with the idea of marriage or simply with the fact that we are not alone. “Perhaps we were in …show more content…
He mentions that many people believe they are seeking happiness in a marriage but he suggests that we really are seeking familiarity. We are looking to recreate with our adult life the destructive feelings we once had in child hood. He states that logically in response we reject spouses that are too balanced and mature, and marry the wrong people because we don’t associate love with feeling happy. One can say a clear and content conscience can contribute to making decisions. He claims that “No one can be in an optimal frame of mind to choose a partner when remaining single feels unbearable” (pg. 2) The logical thing to do when feeling discomfort or pain is to do anything you can to soothe that sensation which again leads to people hastily getting married for relief. In the closing paragraphs Botton brings to our attention that western culture emphasizes on soul mates. Describing it like a fantasy and impractical way of thinking. Instead he offers a logical way to marry the “right” person. He believes that viewing our marriage in a pessimistic way