Sitting at my desk, I stared down at my schoolwork while my mind remained static. Suddenly, I found myself beginning to radiate golden light as my body faded from existence; then before I knew it, I rematerialized out of thin air. This does not happen often, so I was rather confused as I stood atop a cloud, high up in the sky. That is, until I noticed a large, human-like figure appear before me in a holy light. He raised his hands and smiled down at me before bellowing out, “Behold, for it is I; Gabe Newell!” Staring up at our lord and savior, I basked in his glory as he grinned at me. “I have chosen you for the ultimate reward, my son,” he said, causing me to gasp, “for the next twenty-four hours, you may do whatever pleases you! No punishment,
