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33 Cards in this Set
- Front
- Back
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What are the 4 horsemen?
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1.contempt
2.criticism 3.defensiveness 4.stonewalling |
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Define contempt
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partner feels that his or her spouse is inferior or undesireable.
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Define criticism
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making disapproving judgements or evaluations of one's partner.
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defensiveness
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preparing to defend oneself against what one presumes is an upcoming attack
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stonewalling
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refusing to listen to a partner's complaints
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belligerence
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negative communication/relationship behavior that challenges the partner's power and authority
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What are the 2 scales associated with the circumplex model?
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flexibility and cohesion
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Bonding fight guidelines
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A_LISCW_ACE
Avoid mix message Level w/ each other I statements Specific issues Change yourself-be willing Win - don't try to Ask for specific change carefully chose time and place end fight |
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Categories of elderly individuals (including ages).
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1. young old (65-74)
2. older old (75-84) 3. Old-Old (85 and older) |
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Classifications of adult relationships with older parents
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DOS IT
detached obligatory sociable intimate but distant tight knit |
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Three general styles of grandparenting
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RIC
Remote Involved Companionate |
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Creating a stepfamily takes how much time?
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4-7 yrs
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7 stages of stepfamily development
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FIA MAC R
fantasy immersion awareness moblilization action contact resolution |
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Most significant factor in comparative instability of remarriage is.....
BUT marital ____ in remarriage is NOT influenced by.. |
1.presence of stepchildren
2. quality, presence of kids |
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____ percent of women remarry in ___ yrs.
____ after ___ yrs. |
75% of women remarry in 10 yrs.
83% after 15 yrs. |
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What are the five theoretical perspectives adressing the negative effects of divorce on kids?
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PP LEI
Parental Adjustment Parental Loss Life Stress economic hardship interparental conflict |
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Meeting Crisis Creatively
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ICE SOAP
Informal social support Community resources Extended Family Spiritual values Open communication Adaptibility Positive Outlook |
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Types of stressors (which can preceipitate a family crisis)
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SO, A CAD
*Sudden Change *Ongoing family coflict or hassle *Ambiguous Loss (physically absent but still a part of the family, as in divorce or MIA) *Caring for a dependent, ill, or disabled family member *Addition/Loss of family member *demoralizing events |
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ABC-X model of family crisis
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A = the stressor event
B = family's ability to cope with a crisis ( ie, resources, coping skills, knowledge) C= family's appraisal of the stressor event X = the crisis |
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Three perspectives on marital power
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L RR
Least Interest theory = the partner with less of a commitment to the relationship is the one who is more apt to exploit the other. Resource theory = spouse with more resources has the more power in the marriage. This focuses on bacground characteristics and not how they interact. Relative love and need theory = the person most emotionally dependent on the relationship is more likely to comply with the other. |
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What are the six sources of power?
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CELI RR
*Coercive power = threats *Expert power = I know what I am talking about *legitimate power = This power stems from the more dominant individual’s ability to claim authority, or the right to request compliance. *informational power = letting someone know something (i.e, woman convincing husband not to smoke by providing him with info) *Reward power = I'll give you something if you do what I want *Referent power = doing things that we don't nec want to do be/c we care |
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coercive power
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One of the six power bases, or sources of power. This power is based on the dominant person’s ability and willingness to punish the partner either with psychological–emotional or physical abuse, or with more subtle methods of withholding affection.
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expert power
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One of the six power bases, or sources of power. This power stems from the dominant person’s superior judgment, knowledge, or ability.
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informational power
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One of the six power bases, or sources of power. This power is based on the persuasive content of what the dominant person tells another individual.
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legitamite power
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One of the six power bases, or sources of power. This power stems from the more dominant individual’s ability to claim authority, or the right to request compliance.
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referent power
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One of the six power bases, or sources of power. This power is based on the less dominant person’s emotional identification with the more dominant individual
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reward power
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One of the six power bases, or sources of power. This power is based on an individual’s ability to give material or nonmaterial gifts and favors.
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typical tactics used in stonewalling
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LID GRH
*Leaving house to avoid fight *I can't take it when you act this way *Derailing arguments - "I can't take it when you yell at me." *Giving up, refusing to argue but not discussing the problem *Refusing to talk *Hit and run - file complaint, but then leave and refuse to discuss them |
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six qualities of family cohesion
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PAS CC
Positive communication Appreciation Scheduling Spiritual Comitment to promoting happy Crisis Management |
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resource theory
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person with more resources has more power
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theory of least interest
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person with less interest/commitment to the relationship will be more apt to exploit the other person
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relative love and need theory
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person most emotionally invested is most likely to comply
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Ten rules for nourishing a relationship
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*Granted - don't take this way
*Appreciation & Admiration expressed *Verbally express love *Accept partners demands and shortcomings *Share more w/ partner *Alone time *Do unto, etc. *Material expressions of love *offer emotional support *Physical affection |
