I was unhappy. I knew I was unhappy and I knew I had been for a long time. I didn’t do anything about it. I sulked. Wallowed in it. Lived my life without any sense of peace or structure. You see, I don’t handle chaos well. And I’d let myself live in disarray until it built up inside of me and I was made of it. Eventually, I broke. I shattered in the way that a building does when a bomb goes off. I packed the necessities, left my fiance, my family, my home and bought myself a one way ticket to a new city, new job, new life. Except sometimes a change of scenery is just that.
-- Everything is the same here. The people are still awful and the metropolis …show more content…
I know you!” the voice of a man startles me as I start up the stairs in my complex. I turn abruptly, hand in my purse, clutching a can of pepper spray. “You’re in Psych 405, right?” I recognize him almost immediately now. He sits one row ahead of me and is always chock full of snark directed towards our pompous professor. I’m fairly certain he’s failing. He’s sporting a warm smile, catching up to me now and breathing heavily. “Jordan. Charlotte right?”
It takes me a second to reply. I remember how sociable I was before I came here, and how the only person I’ve had a real conversation with is my roommate. “I like Charlie, actually.” I correct him, shrugging my shoulders. “But yeah, I, uh, I’m always up to hear you slay ol’ Kuntz on my mondays.”
He chuckles. “Glad someone’s enjoying themselves.” He runs his hands through his hair and rocks on his heels. “Hey, I’m gonna turn in, I’m fucking starved, but tomorrow’s Halloween, you got plans?” I worry for a second he’s about to ask me on a …show more content…
You should come. It’s not really a party as much as it is a few theater majors getting crossfaded, but we have a good time usually. Oh, wear a costume. Matt’s pretty serious about that shit.”
“Is it cool if I bring my roommate?” I distinctly remember Nora moaning about not having plans.
“Shit if I care. More the merrier.” He paces down the other hall towards the elevator before shouting back. “FUCK! It’s 24b, say like, 9? See ya ‘round!”
Nora is asleep when I go inside so I shoot her a text about the party. The feeling in the pit of my stomach is almost unfamiliar. I’m not sure if it’s excitement to have a functioning social life again or anxiety over the possibility of things getting bad again. I decide it’s both, and that I’m not going to shut my emotions off this time. I’m going to let myself feel again.
--
Nora and I are at Party City, which is desolate as far as costumes go. Left are a few racist unmentionables and some outstandingly unattractive gag costumes. Nora picks up a bacon and eggs couples costume. “We could go this route,” she says skeptically.
“I kinda want to get laid tonight. Or you know, at least have the potential to attract someone cute.” Nora giggles at my response initially, then her eyes grow