The Last Jarrell Family Vacation
When my father told my brother and I that the family was going on a trip to France, my brother threw the water bottle he was holding into the ceiling fan. Water and plastic exploded everywhere. My dad screamed and my mom whimpered. I laughed.
Last week Tommy bought his first car. It’s a used 1998 Toyota Civic. Even though it is old and shitty, Tommy loves his car more than he loves dad or mom or me.
Mom took a photography class at the community college last year. A month before our trip, she made Tommy wash a section of the living room wall. He washed a square about as tall and as wide as him. He used a magic eraser. With the eraser, he wrote “fuck you,” next to the square of white wall. Even though …show more content…
Tommy and I play tic-tac-toe. The woman across the aisle snores loudly. Tommy is terrible at tic-tac-toe. I tell him that this is a sign that he should do less drugs. Tommy crumples up our tic-tac-toe game. He throws the ball of paper at the woman across the aisle. We laugh. She sleeps on.
A new stewardess asks if we would like anything to drink. Tommy orders a Jinn and Tonic. The stewardess asks for his ID. Tommy says his ID is in his suitcase. He says he fucked up real bad. I tell the stewardess that Tommy is 22. “His birthday is August 17th.”
“What year?” asks the stewardess.
“1992,” I say. I am really good at arithmetic. It’s the reason why I have managed to bullshit my way through Algebra so well.
The waitress gives Tommy his Jinn and Tonic. Tommy says that he and I are friends again.
Tommy falls asleep. I fall asleep on Tommy’s shoulder.
We land at Paris-Charles de Gaulle airport. I am surprised to see that it is dark outside. Mom keeps making Tommy and I practice our French. Tommy knows how to say, “Veux le vous couchez avec moi?” He says it over and over. Dad thinks this is funny, but mom gets mad. Even though I have taken four year of French, I know hardly anything. This is because every year our French teacher gets fired. This is because I learned sign-language so that the one girl who knows French in our class can sign us all the answers. This is because I get frustrated by my French homework and mom does most of it for me. This is because …show more content…
Dad gets some sort of spicy pasta. I get lamb. Tommy gets a plate of meatballs. We all order wine. Dad is mad because he wanted to eat at his favorite restaurant. Mom tells Dad we have a reservation there tomorrow night. This isn’t good enough for Dad. He pouts. Tommy and I order another glass of wine. I keep expecting to be scolded for drinking by nobody says anything. Tommy and I are getting along again. A cute French girl comes into the restaurant. She looks at Tommy. I look at her. Tommy looks at me. “Tommy, did you see that?” I ask. “That girl was checking you out!” Tommy looks at the French girl. He says there is no way she was checking him out. He says she is too hot for him. The French girl is picking up an order at the counter. She doesn’t stay long. When she leaves, she waves at Tommy and I. Tommy laughs
When my father told my brother and I that the family was going on a trip to France, my brother threw the water bottle he was holding into the ceiling fan. Water and plastic exploded everywhere. My dad screamed and my mom whimpered. I laughed.
Last week Tommy bought his first car. It’s a used 1998 Toyota Civic. Even though it is old and shitty, Tommy loves his car more than he loves dad or mom or me.
Mom took a photography class at the community college last year. A month before our trip, she made Tommy wash a section of the living room wall. He washed a square about as tall and as wide as him. He used a magic eraser. With the eraser, he wrote “fuck you,” next to the square of white wall. Even though …show more content…
Tommy and I play tic-tac-toe. The woman across the aisle snores loudly. Tommy is terrible at tic-tac-toe. I tell him that this is a sign that he should do less drugs. Tommy crumples up our tic-tac-toe game. He throws the ball of paper at the woman across the aisle. We laugh. She sleeps on.
A new stewardess asks if we would like anything to drink. Tommy orders a Jinn and Tonic. The stewardess asks for his ID. Tommy says his ID is in his suitcase. He says he fucked up real bad. I tell the stewardess that Tommy is 22. “His birthday is August 17th.”
“What year?” asks the stewardess.
“1992,” I say. I am really good at arithmetic. It’s the reason why I have managed to bullshit my way through Algebra so well.
The waitress gives Tommy his Jinn and Tonic. Tommy says that he and I are friends again.
Tommy falls asleep. I fall asleep on Tommy’s shoulder.
We land at Paris-Charles de Gaulle airport. I am surprised to see that it is dark outside. Mom keeps making Tommy and I practice our French. Tommy knows how to say, “Veux le vous couchez avec moi?” He says it over and over. Dad thinks this is funny, but mom gets mad. Even though I have taken four year of French, I know hardly anything. This is because every year our French teacher gets fired. This is because I learned sign-language so that the one girl who knows French in our class can sign us all the answers. This is because I get frustrated by my French homework and mom does most of it for me. This is because …show more content…
Dad gets some sort of spicy pasta. I get lamb. Tommy gets a plate of meatballs. We all order wine. Dad is mad because he wanted to eat at his favorite restaurant. Mom tells Dad we have a reservation there tomorrow night. This isn’t good enough for Dad. He pouts. Tommy and I order another glass of wine. I keep expecting to be scolded for drinking by nobody says anything. Tommy and I are getting along again. A cute French girl comes into the restaurant. She looks at Tommy. I look at her. Tommy looks at me. “Tommy, did you see that?” I ask. “That girl was checking you out!” Tommy looks at the French girl. He says there is no way she was checking him out. He says she is too hot for him. The French girl is picking up an order at the counter. She doesn’t stay long. When she leaves, she waves at Tommy and I. Tommy laughs