I can do this. I am capable.
I pick up my bags and begin to fill the trunk of my crappy car with my few crappy belongings. At least I can leave this crappy apartment and crappy husband behind. I run back inside and wake up my sweet Charlotte. I grab the last of our bags and stuff them into the trunk, making sure to slam it for good measure. When I step back inside Charlotte is watching cartoons, just like she should be on any normal morning. Her sweet hazel eyes are still filled with sleep.
“Turn off the TV please, baby and get in the car.”
“But Momma, I’m hungry.”
“Okay, how about we get pancakes this morning?”
“PANCAKES!?”
She runs to the car as fast as her little bare feet will carry her and begins buckling herself into her booster seat …show more content…
I slam the front door so hard the frame shudders. I wish this apartment would come crashing down. I take a few deep breaths and get in the car.
“Momma, are we going on a trip?”
“Yes, baby.”
“How long?”
“I’m not sure yet, baby.”
“Is daddy coming too?”
“No baby, it’s a girl’s trip.”
“A girls trip with lots of pancakes?”
“Yes, baby, whatever you want.”
And so went the first hour of our drive. She asked question after question, until she finally exhausted her curiosity and fell silent. I watched her round face in the rear view, leaned up against the window, watching the world pass by. Any normal person would be annoyed at her for her barrage of questions, but not me. She is after all, my salvation.
In one of the next towns we stopped for the promised pancakes. She inhaled hers with ferocity.
Mine went mostly untouched. The anger I felt had dissipated and now in its place, a fear settled in, seeping deep into my bones.
We have no money. We have no home. I am now a single mother. What about when Charlotte is supposed to start school? What if he tracks us down and finds us? He would probably kill me
this time. Charlotte would be left alone in the world with that monster. He’s going to look for …show more content…
“Yes, baby?”
“Are we leaving daddy?”
“Yes, baby,” it was more of a sigh than a sentence.
“Okay.”
And just like that, I knew it would be. We were leaving for her, I wish I could explain that to her.
I wish her little five year old brain would comprehend what was happening. I’m damaged goods, broken so many times over I don’t think I could be put back together again. Like Humpty
Dumpty. But Charlotte? She was untouched and unbroken; I couldn’t let him change that. I wouldn’t. She is purity solidified. I have not done one thing right other than her, and maybe now this, hopefully this. She is my salvation.
We ran. We ran until we had an empty gas tank and $100 left to our names. The town we stopped in was called Defiance, ironically enough. Defiance, Ohio. Population: 16,000. It had small town charm, but I just hoped this would be large enough to blend into. I woke Charlotte up from her nap. She had crawled out of her booster to curl up like a cat in the backseat. Not the safest way to travel, but she had earned a little freedom today. We both had.
We stopped into Jewell Café for lunch. There, we ran into a bunch of friendly looking
I pick up my bags and begin to fill the trunk of my crappy car with my few crappy belongings. At least I can leave this crappy apartment and crappy husband behind. I run back inside and wake up my sweet Charlotte. I grab the last of our bags and stuff them into the trunk, making sure to slam it for good measure. When I step back inside Charlotte is watching cartoons, just like she should be on any normal morning. Her sweet hazel eyes are still filled with sleep.
“Turn off the TV please, baby and get in the car.”
“But Momma, I’m hungry.”
“Okay, how about we get pancakes this morning?”
“PANCAKES!?”
She runs to the car as fast as her little bare feet will carry her and begins buckling herself into her booster seat …show more content…
I slam the front door so hard the frame shudders. I wish this apartment would come crashing down. I take a few deep breaths and get in the car.
“Momma, are we going on a trip?”
“Yes, baby.”
“How long?”
“I’m not sure yet, baby.”
“Is daddy coming too?”
“No baby, it’s a girl’s trip.”
“A girls trip with lots of pancakes?”
“Yes, baby, whatever you want.”
And so went the first hour of our drive. She asked question after question, until she finally exhausted her curiosity and fell silent. I watched her round face in the rear view, leaned up against the window, watching the world pass by. Any normal person would be annoyed at her for her barrage of questions, but not me. She is after all, my salvation.
In one of the next towns we stopped for the promised pancakes. She inhaled hers with ferocity.
Mine went mostly untouched. The anger I felt had dissipated and now in its place, a fear settled in, seeping deep into my bones.
We have no money. We have no home. I am now a single mother. What about when Charlotte is supposed to start school? What if he tracks us down and finds us? He would probably kill me
this time. Charlotte would be left alone in the world with that monster. He’s going to look for …show more content…
“Yes, baby?”
“Are we leaving daddy?”
“Yes, baby,” it was more of a sigh than a sentence.
“Okay.”
And just like that, I knew it would be. We were leaving for her, I wish I could explain that to her.
I wish her little five year old brain would comprehend what was happening. I’m damaged goods, broken so many times over I don’t think I could be put back together again. Like Humpty
Dumpty. But Charlotte? She was untouched and unbroken; I couldn’t let him change that. I wouldn’t. She is purity solidified. I have not done one thing right other than her, and maybe now this, hopefully this. She is my salvation.
We ran. We ran until we had an empty gas tank and $100 left to our names. The town we stopped in was called Defiance, ironically enough. Defiance, Ohio. Population: 16,000. It had small town charm, but I just hoped this would be large enough to blend into. I woke Charlotte up from her nap. She had crawled out of her booster to curl up like a cat in the backseat. Not the safest way to travel, but she had earned a little freedom today. We both had.
We stopped into Jewell Café for lunch. There, we ran into a bunch of friendly looking